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If Russia does not understand the mind, then you understand Russian act of women?
Oh, genius of pure beauty, well, why are you stupid? ..
One look at her was enough to understand what is impotence ...
What is pluralism? This is when those with money and power can
free plyuvat for those who do not.
- Mr. Bill Gates, you heard that the Somali pirates seized
- Yes, this is what brings the use of unlicensed copies of Windows.
The highest stage of development of political correctness: tolerance against
America thinks that the whole world - a chessboard. But the world has already - field
- How many Poles, to launch a rocket?
- One! The rest will do the Americans ...
Sarkozy has asked Russia to postpone the deployment of missiles in Kaliningrad --
Poles have created a shortage of diapers in Europe ...
A guess: a Baltic country team to jump the most protracted
Forms of government in Ukraine: the monarchy - anarchy - democracy - ochlocracy
- Hohlokratiya ...
At a recent meeting of the State Duma amended the Charter
Internal Service of the Armed Forces of Russia: to the list
ranks added the rank of general of accessories.
Obama: You heard the president chose me!
Secretary: I've heard. Congratulations, Mr. President!
Obama: So much work ahead ... Well, nothing, rest on Saturday ...
Secretary: Saturday you have a working day.
Obama: Hmmm ... And Sunday?
Secretary: The same worker.
Obama: So this is what comes out - on holiday break?
Secretary: On holidays, you will work too.
Secretary: Because you are black, Mr. President.
We send the latest news. Yesterday, several units
Galactic Gendarmerie was dispersed nesnktsionirovanny Man
Marsh. A small crowd of earthlings-nationalists in several million
people walked through the streets of Moscow to Siberia, chanting the forbidden
slogan "Earth - for the people!". As stated by the mayor, worthless Nazis
intergalactic foment discord in our mnogotsivilizatsionnoy
Galactic Federation ... "We will relentlessly and severely cracking down
with the chauvinists and xenophobes! We will not allow the sow enmity against
a humanoid extraterrestrial races living in our hospitable and
tolerant Earth! "- he explained to correspondents.
That's the best advice we can give to young people: find something that
you like to do, and then find someone who will be writing for this
Not so hard to take its place, as to understand - where.
When a man returns to his woman from a long trip, a woman
languor whispers: - Favorite, you're back!
When the screw back to its nut from the far box, nut in
languor squeaks - Favorite, you put in!
We take your words back ... We came up with new ones.
- Barrymore, what a terrible howl?
- Kirkorov, sir.
If you come to three Uzbeks and say - hello lads, they are not
offended. And if you go to the three crest and say - hello Uzbeks?
- Good appetite!
- You're a fat pig!
There are two friends: the young and old.
- Tell me as an experienced man, what do you do when you see
that you pay attention to girls and young women?
- Check whether the buttoned my pants ...
Something does not understand these women, it's not always so. He bought his wife for
birthday dorogushchiye spinning, but it is displeased.
Girl - Though Where!
Although when, even with Kem ...
With the financial crisis has become unprofitable to sell home, but was still
more advantageous to rob her.
- Dad, how to write in the book: "pledged" or "They took
- Well, it's like someone! The women give and take guys!
Ellie zhaduetsya Spunky Leo:
- Dear Leo, in the magical country is a hot sun! And it's rays
harmful! What to do?
- Oh, Ellie, I know! You need to smudge mayonnaise!
- And what, Leo - this is safe?
- No, girl, tasty!
Finding Neverland, the road of yellow brick. Girl Ellie knocks on
- Let me go to sleep, aunt! I'm so hungry ...
- And your friends, girl, not hungry?
- No, aunt. Scarecrow and Lumberjack not need food.
- A lion?
- If he were hungry, would I be now to talk to you?
When in life everything is running smoothly, our figure tends to seek to form
Already many people know that cats Kuklachev bombed without his knowledge, but few
knows that they are bombing Afghanistan.
- Hello, and who is you break the glass?
- I, but blame mother-in-law!
- She dodged when I dropped the hammer.
Allow all, would not be caught.
Moscow. There are two, one another:
- How are you, where you work?
- Yes, well ... Here in the office of President ...
- Oh! A Russian out there a lot?
- Yes, there is one.
- Bastards! Everywhere prolezut!
Why Lithuania supports Georgia? - Because they work in the presidential
Barack Obama in bed wife Michelle affectionately calls "my lamb."
- Hey, Avdotya!
- FAQ you, daughter?
- Ever hear, someone there entoy Merike president chosen?
- And Cavo same?
- Yes, Gutorov, some Fool Ebana!
- Rabinovich, and you know who by nationality Barack Obama?
- "Nothing Bu talking!
While Ukrainians are proud to be planted his girl under James
Bond, Kenyans smiled modestly.
The election of Obama - the black humor of Americans ...
Ma born to the earth to make dust ... Happy SRF, gentlemen!
I'm not lazy, I am resting in advance.
- What is it?
Patient (raising his hands to the sky):
- How do you like? Studied 6 years and asked my diagnosis!
- Do you clear nicotine poisoning!
- Yes you that, I do not smoke.
- Yes? Unfortunately, this greatly complicates the diagnosis.
Unlike western Russia's speed bumps lying policemen
dressed in the form of something mumble and sometimes try to get up.
Invented me today in the process of passing the test on IQ.
User lets test IQ.
- Questions finished. Send SMS ID ..... the number XXXX to get
- Are you ohreneli all! Send SMS without knowing its value? It
may be a divorce on the money!
- Congratulations. IQ Test completed successfully!
The first appointment of Barack Obama.
The newly elected president and vice president, Barack Hussein Obama and
Joseph Biden made their first appointment.
The post of President of Georgia, they have appointed well-known Georgian
Politics Nino Burjanadze.
- Twenty-five, twenty-five - berry girl again!
- Aha ... And when it was already over thirty - a woman just buttock!
One young artists liked painting "Girl with
peaches, and he decided to copy it. But when the end of the work came to
peaches, ended with a yellow-pink color, and they were white.
I had to call reproduction "Girl with Eggs ...
- Why does a woman after refueling the car shakes no hose?
- Well, where did she would undertake this reflex?
- I have a purse all wet!
- So after the financial crisis.
- So what?
- So did your money!