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Swedish anecdote
One man was supposed to leave for a long time and that his wife has not changed, bought
her rubber voodoo member. No sooner had the woman said that she wants
as voodoo member immediately began to vibrate, where necessary. Woman was
happy and immediately ordered:
- Wood-term, in p. .. doo!
I started to enjoy. But when she wanted to stop voodoo-term, it is not
obeyed. She went to the hospital to get him. But since it
continued to receive an orgasm for orgasm, and then drove along the road very
wryly.
She was stopped by police. She began it explains about the voodoo dick.
The policeman turned red and yelled:
- Are you a fool keeps me going? Wood-member! In the ass ...
Joke #43247 —  
 
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- You what sports do you do?
- Synchronized diving.
- So you train one speaker!
- A shadow?
Joke #43246 —  
 
0
 
Pap, and people can fly?
That teacher said that they can not.
And Grisha-boxer said that they can.
Joke #43245 —  
 
0
 
- Dad, onion helpful?
- Useful.
- Dad, and sour cream helpful?
- Travel.
- Daddy, buy me then potato chips with onion and sour cream!
Joke #43244 —  
 
0
 
Selling 37 T-72 tanks, wholesalers superskidki.
Goods are in safekeeping in Somalia.

Yushchenko
Joke #43062 —  
 
0
 
A bottle of vodka - it is such a thing that can cut down one of our
Vasya. Or 50 Vietnamese - and this is only from smoke hung over Wasi.
Joke #43061 —  
 
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To never iron a shirt, it will never be erased.
To never wash the shirt, it should never be worn.
To never wear a shirt, I had previously thought, and remain
monkey.
Joke #43060 —  
 
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Lying - a struggle for the truth by other means.
Joke #43059 —  
 
0
 
The invisible hand of the market has allocated 700 billion dollars for self-regulation
prices on U.S. stock exchanges.
Joke #43058 —  
 
0
 
Did you know that ...
... prototype drone aircraft was an American White House era
George W. Bush?
www.msk2004.narod.ru
Joke #43057 —  
 
0
 
Cargo Progress with trash not been flooded as usual, but made
soft landing in Siberia. And our astronauts to the ISS were surprised not less
Americans incredible disappearance of the secret Pentagon Papers accident
delivered Chatelet.
Joke #43055 —  
 
0
 
Yesterday, without the formation of black holes, encountered 10 in the nineteenth
degree of protons. The lower part of the protons in the form of car Mazda
large - in the form of column.
Joke #43054 —  
 
0
 
If the capital will continue to "turn blue" and further,
then soon to cry "For us Moscow!" Defenders of the Fatherland
begin to cover their rears ...
Joke #43053 —  
 
0
 
Good advice!
If you bought $ 1000 of shares in Delta Airlines one year ago, now
the cost of your package would be $ 194, with Fannie Mae you have left
$ 2.50, but with AIG - less than $ 15. But if you then bought for $ 1000 of beer,
drank it and passed Aluminum cans, you would have had $ 214 in cash.
Based on the above, it is best investment advice now
is: plump and firmly take packaging ...
Joke #43052 —  
 
0
 
Conversation between two friends:
- Imagine my jen utterly sbrendila - all refused
engage in sex with me.
- In what sense?
- Well said, that while I come home sober - do not give.
Joke #43051 —  
 
0
 
And now the 2012 election, and became our three presidents.
Joke #43050 —  
 
0
 
I always worry prostitutes mouthful.
Joke #43049 —  
 
0
 
If in a public place suddenly breaks off a beautiful melody, it means
someone wanted to talk horror as the telephone.
Joke #43048 —  
 
0
 
American Phoenix was unable to find water on Mars, but, judging by
mineral composition, before she was there. This proves conclusively that
Jews used to live on Mars.
Joke #43047 —  
 
0
 
How nice that networking messaging is no evidence of
read the message ... how could simplify the process of mailing agendas
in this call ...
Joke #43046 —  
 
0
 
It used to Othello asked: "Have you prayed at night, Desdemona?"
Now he just opens the mail, ICQ and telephone number of Desdemona and without
issues knows when and to whom she prayed.
Joke #43045 —  
 
0
 
The International Chamber of Weights and Measures standards of justice appeared,
truth and happiness. Unfortunately, still can not see them because there is no more
such microscopes.
Joke #43044 —  
 
0
 
News: On the mend the broken Large Hadron Collider
NATO plans to allocate a large sum. Asked what
most interested in NATO, they got an answer:
- The generals would particularly like to see how the bombard atomic nuclei.
Joke #43043 —  
 
0
 
Parkinson's Law for scientific research at 100% is applicable for
modern nano-technology:
"Success in research is such an increase in subsidies
that continued research is impossible. "
Joke #43042 —  
 
0
 
- Did you hear, Ivanova improved?
- Do not have improved, and he rose!
- How it myself?
- Well, tripped on a stool and improved light bulb ...
Joke #43041 —  
 
0
 
Two advertiser discuss how to present to the market a new homeopathic
tablets from a cold:
- Let's write simply "a treatment for nasal flora
origin.
- No, do not go. Can understand so that the tool is intended only
Nasal plant origin.
- Then let's write a "vegetable remedies for the nose.
- The type that nose grow?
- Then an unambiguous version of the tool from the cold.
- This is better, but somehow not original.
- To take a more original word "tool from the nozzle.
- Brilliant, this is like a brand, a slogan throughout the campaign
make "Our attack on the nozzles!
Joke #43040 —  
 
0
 
Internet porn, without the wedding without vodka.
Joke #43039 —  
 
0
 
(with emphasis)
- You name?
- Ablert.
- And can beat - Albert?
- Oh There you Luce polyuchaetsya!
Joke #43038 —  
 
0
 
- Dad, why expired yogurt green?
- This peaceful bacteria wearing military uniforms and become biological
arms, my son.
Joke #43037 —  
 
0
 
The paradox of stupidity:
For all its infinite stupidity, even very limited.
Joke #43036 —  
 
0
 
The girl who refused soldier
should be prosecuted for treason.

Joke #43035 —  
 
0
 
- Dad, what is true of life?
- The truth of life is that all lies.
- And what's the point?
- And the point is to extract from this truth.
Joke #43034 —  
 
0
 
Indian Summer Shoot! Baba is, but the summer gone!
(C) Igor-Internet
Joke #43033 —  
 
0
 
At competitions in ski jumping, Estonian skier won first
place. And all because of the fact that jumping through a few minutes followed
Swedish athlete ran into him in the air and gave him this
additional inertia.
Joke #43032 —  
 
0
 
Purpose emo - discarded sneakers!
Joke #43031 —  
 
0
 
She said my mother as a child: "Do not clowning, but then so all my life
stay. "Do not listen to her little Sergei Zverev.
Joke #43030 —  
 
0
 
Promotional poster in the men's room: "If you can write above this
line, Fire Department invites you to work "
Joke #43029 —  
 
0
 
Drunken firefighter fell from a 40-meter fire escape, but remained intact and
unharmed! He saved what he managed to climb only to the second
step.
Joke #43028 —  
 
0
 
Blazes a strong fire. A lot of firefighters calculations tirelessly trying to
to extinguish it. They slowly suits some guy:
- Men! A light will not?
Joke #43027 —  
 
0
 
The women on any issue is always ready to answer any.
Joke #43026 —  
 
0
 
Two mosquito to man:
- Mum, the taste of blood selenium and stinking, yes?
- Fool, fly here, you sat on the bladder.
Joke #43025 —  
 
0
 
Nothing so binds, as a brotherhood of blood, released from the other.
Joke #43024 —  
 
0
 
In exchanges of Russia Autumn Sale! Discounts of 50%!
Joke #43023 —  
 
0
 
- All is lost, all is lost ... What to do with the exchanges will all fall!
- What, what, close and board up nails, crosswise.
- Is that all?
- You can hang the announcement "Send".
Joke #43022 —  
 
0
 
Business news.
... now as the financial markets are closed today. Financial markets
closed.
Joke #43021 —  
 
0
 
McKay looked into Putin's eyes and read there: KGB
Putin looked into the eyes of McCain and read there: Prat. CFV. HYDRATED ...
Joke #43020 —  
 
0
 
Open letter to Somali pirates.

Dear comrades pirates. In connection with your claim the 30 millionth
ransom for abducted crew of the vessel "Faina" appeal to you with a request to
next time just steal 30 million dollars and not to fool people
head.
Joke #43019 —  
 
0
 
- Well, where do I learn more? I, except the Internet, do not go anywhere!
Joke #43018 —  
 
0
 
Our ads are increasingly drawn to the unconscious, because
conscious of the people less and less.
Joke #43017 —  
 
0
 
Watson returned from tours in Russia.
- You know, Holmes, it took me all of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.
A dozen ladies immediately wanted to marry me.
- Do not flatter yourself, my dear Watson. They probably wanted to marry you on
calculation. As their names?
- The first three I remember. Ustinov Dontsova, Marinina ...
Joke #43016 —  
 
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