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Guus Hiddink came to the pharmacy:
- Me, please, 11 tablets Validol.
- E.. be, 11 condom?
Sad looking away ... - 11 Gandon already have ...
All diseases of the nerves .... even pregnancy.
You know that it is impossible, but nerves can not stand.
The husband comes home from the store.
Wife takes out and puts food on the refrigerator shelves.
Wife, puzzled: Listen, you have one bottle of beer is not fully sold!
Husband: E hm ... I bought something there ... (looks at the check) as well, yes! One
complete, one is not complete and four more empty.
Vladimir Putin congratulated Yushchenko on NATO membership.
In our football team every football player can threaten the gate
opponent, especially verbally.
In his youth, Venus de Milo was very brave, for example, it could
quietly feeding crocodiles directly with hands.
Is it possible to trust the people's choice, whose fairy-tale hero and a fool?
Of all the modes that can be in this country, the most convenient --
Live on my knees uncomfortable and humiliating. Whether it lying down!
- Wan, here you Masha met, she loved you?
- I do not know, she's not talking.
- Are you her?
- I do not know, I'm not saying ...
We have confidence in the future is usually expressed in foul form.
Some women want to hear the beautiful words of love, others prefer
trivial stamp in the passport. But many want to do both. From that
beautiful words, but from another stamp.
Become a star of Russia's show business can be either through the father, or through
I wonder how mothers feed their babies with tiny spoons
forks. Interestingly, and as feed their children Chinese mom ...
When a woman says: "And maybe run away?", The most difficult thing is not done
The young wife complains about his mother:
- My husband has treated me worse. I do not know what to do.
- Be a little more attention, care, - tells his mother.
- Yes, I am concerned and so.
- So little you care ... Do you know, for example, his tastes?
Give him what I like.
Daughter, weeping, said:
- So what do you advise me to give him ... Blondes?
A guy calls plumber:
- Sorry for bothering you, you know, I have something wrong with
toilet. Could you, at your convenience, if you do not
look at him?
- Good! In the afternoon brings.
It is strange that the "team" Russia at Eurovision Bilan did not help yet
Putin, pointing to the background techniques sambo ....
Satan comes to Ukrainian President Viktor Yushchenko and said:
- Sell me your soul, very expensive to pay.
But Yushchenko replied:
- No, Satan, S. C. A. more pay.
Girls - they like oil. First, explore, then burish, and then ...
then close the hole that is cheaper than to keep.
At the inauguration of Dmitry Medvedev gave the flowers-Semicvetik. At Bilan
fourth was spent lepestochek ...
Wife - her husband:
- You would have though with a child that I spoke, his life to teach ...
Husband - his son:
- Listen here, sonny, like go out on the eighth level, there just behind
door around the corner, three goat standing. So you shoot immediately, as soon as
door will open!
- Superman, Superman, where are you?
- I'm in the toilet.
- Save us, Superman.
- I can not, I have diarrhea.
- But it superzadanie, it's definitely a superman?
- Yes, I am superman, and I superponos.
We are often distressed, making ridiculous mistakes, but more often laugh, making
Strange that he Zhigunov. What with Zavorotniuk lived.
I usually have enough four minutes .. Well, well .. two and a half.
- I will never stop loving my job!
- You sure?
- One hundred per cent. To stop loving her, you must first love her.
Sunflowers multiply seeds. Through attendants.
Little Johnny comes home from school with a torn cap.
Mother asks him:
- What have you got a hat?
And Little Johnny says:
- Guys its football played.
- And what do you do then?
- At the gate stood.
Terrible to think that could still win Bilan, if it could sing.
We still have Eurovision 2008!
Not vytem or by crook ...
Even Bilan was unable to prevent Evgeni Plushenko Edwin Marton and win
President Dmitry Medvedev has learned of Bilan's victory at the Eurovision ...
- Is he too will come to the Kremlin? I congratulate him, as the players and
Hockey? I am not ... I'm sick!!
Issue of the Armenian radio:
- What you need to do to win the Eurovision?
- It is necessary to divide the country into 16 small countries and send them
representatives to the competition, but through the rest of the country miss
Even after winning the Eurovision Song Contest revealed a terrible secret: the Edwin
Marton was not a Stradivarius violin!
After the second channel showed all the triumphs of Russia, it must
renamed the First!
Yes, there is a recipe for victory at the European Championship!
We must all play team Russia show on Channel Two!
All rejoiced in the victory of Russia in the Eurovision-2008. Upset only
some Moscow's secretary, whose chief has promised that she would go
where will the next Eurovision Song Contest.
Indeed, Russia's figure skating school has no equal!
Now our Olympic champion and three-time world champion has won
Grateful residents of Russia passed Respect master Antonio Stradivari
for violin, specially made for the Eurovision-2008.
Higher prices for gasoline - is one way to fight with Moscow
) Sent AVG (
- I somewhere forgot my cell phone ...
- So, call him and find it.
- I can not.
- I tell - forgotten!
Two heads are good, if one is more important. And especially good if the main
Under the speed bump is not undermined.
Eurovision-2008 Stradivarius violin, and won the Olympic champion
Plushenko. On vocals was something Bilan.
Dima Bilan, once arrived at the Eurovision Song Contest, once said - if not
win this time, then the next - come with Valuev.
At the Eurovision-2009 "Russia will be represented Joseph Kobzon
team of Russia on hockey.
In connection with Dima Bilan's victory in the Eurovision, Guus Hiddink
Evgeni Plushenko led to Russia's national team football at EURO 2008.
Once upon a Victor Belan. His name, he wrote an error. A name generally forgotten.
It appeared Dima Bilan.
Football. Xokey. Contest. Not the best use of a stabilization