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- Is it good or bad, that Chubais did not have to astronauts?
- Good and bad.
- For the space well, but bad for us!
If life was written in C + +, then Niyazov would be an object of class
Turkmenbashi, produced from the base class ChurbanBalda.
From the Moldovan folklore.
Mary and Jon (the husband and wife) put potatoes. She at one end of the field, he --
another. At this time, galloping on a black horse neighbor Vasile. Horse
left to graze, and he crept up to Mary:
- Hey, Maria, come on, they say, until your idiot running, we are a bit of fun.
- Do not .. I can not, the husband may suddenly break away from work and come here.
Yes, and your horse can steal.
- And I'll tie a rope from the horse to his leg. He is my clever - only
uchuet trouble, just give a sign.
- Oh, I'm afraid ... Well, never mind. Come on!
Vasile tied his horse to his feet, lowered his pants and lay down on Mary. Just
while her husband sees another's horse in his field and threw him in the cobblestones.
The horse became frightened and ran away returned.
Maria gets up from the field, shakes off the ground and cries after a neighbor:
- Hey, Vasile, turn on the back, and then dig all the potatoes!
Why blonde licks his watch?
She heard somewhere that the tick-tock has only one calorie.
Yesterday, we drank vodka. Then the vodka is finished and we ran for a beer. Pili
beer, and after, and when beer is gone, it turned out that others were
brandy. And we began to drink brandy. And then I was poisoned oatmeal cookies ...
New family program:
Sex - in exchange for food
- Do not suggest how to reach the mental hospital?
- See a couple of Mexican serials!
Message in my inbox: Congratulations!
You won a FREE year's subscription on parole.
If a black cat crossed your path, then go to you and the road.
Best top model!
A desktop model! Laptop model!
Between us there is nothing! We even love the different people:
she loves me, and I love her.
There is a dispute on the part of sex man and woman. Male:
- We are like a helicopter - immediately got up and fly wherever you want!
- And we like an airplane - at first accelerated, then take off and fly,
- And all in one direction!
- But above, on and people can take more!
- Girl, and what size you wear olveys?
- I'm going, so on the street, and meet me a girl: "Uncle, let the ruble."
So I gave. Then, another little girl. Again, given ... And in the evening from
his wife was: "What a brute, again all paid for girls to spend? "
At the canal Griboedova yesterday was found dismembered corpse
men. Police so quickly arrived at a place that criminals could hardly have claimed
A strange vehicle - piano: just three wheels and one wing,
and for the management of this miracle came up with two pedals, dozens of keys, or
a steering and auxiliary stool.
God loves a trinity. But can not admit, because Neo jealous.
This Estonian in life should do three things:
catch, catch, and again in time.
Pre-Perestroika time, approximately when he died one by one our
great leaders. In the subway sitting across from each other two men. One
opens the newspaper and the second to the light sees that the newspaper published
large obituary. He leans slightly to the first and quietly:
The second slightly lowers the newspaper, clatter his lips and shakes his negative
Do not trust, do not be afraid, do not ask - the basics of driving in the city of Moscow.
In the U.S., the struggle for equality has led to the fact that women now
equated to blacks, blue and disabled.
Danila Bagrov - Menisu, playing with a gun:
- Tell me, an American - what power? You think about money? That's my brother
I said that in the money ... A right to speak - in the money!
Ex-convict to buy a refrigerator. Seller:
- Here is a very good model. Double chamber. In one cell cool
temperature, and in another cell in general wild cold!
- Ah Type the cooler!
Argued once Armenians and Georgians, who have an echo in the mountains steeper.
Let's go to Armenia, climbed Ararat and shouting:
"asshole" - echo "pas", "PA", "PA" ... The Georgians say: fu!
Let's go to Georgia, climbed Kazbek. Georgians shouted "asshole" and
naff, and echo "where", "where", "where" ...
Armenians ask a fade-why?
- And until they do not stop!
Trinity lies naked on the bed next to Neo stands uncertainly
peretaptyvayas from foot to foot. He gets phone:
- Program Kamasutra
In honor of the arrival of George Bush in St. Petersburg was made
Fifteen rounds of the ceremonial cannon. Unfortunately, no one came.
Tormented by the question: is it worth to become an actor, so that at each
stop hanging your portrait with the inscription:
- Tell me, please, Rabinowitz lives in this house?
- Yes, on the third floor. Only his name Michelson.
Conductor of the new internationalist Symphony Orchestra presents
musicians to foreign journalists:
- It Petrov, Russian. Petrenko, a Ukrainian. Petrosian, an Armenian. Petashvili,
Georgians. This Rabinovich, violinist.
Baseball in Russia somehow never caught on ... but baseball bats used
- So, take a survey?
- Yes, I do not know how to write!
- Well, then, and write: an illiterate!
- Sorry, you sit on my hat.
- I know. And what are you already leaving?
The man asks the guy:
- What would you like to have - five thousand dollars or five daughters?
- Five daughters.
- Because now I have eight of their ...
At the moment of danger only strausihi hiding their heads in the sand, and ostriches in
this time hiding the eggs.
Once in a village missing man. After some time ashore
washed up drowned, and the police decided that it was missing. Investigator
calls to his wife, the man from the identification of the corpse and asked:
- Did your husband's distinguishing characteristics?
- And what, he was a stutterer.
- I do not like a Jew!
- Of course. But all Jews are like you.
Steels are known drafts of the chorus in the song A. Gubin
"These girls - like the stars." First:
"But if you're a regular guy
You do not appear horseradish
Such girls as the stars
Such stars as it is. "
"But if you're a regular guy
You do not appear dick
Such girls as the stars
What light in the sky until morning. "
Executable from the stage version of the rhyme with "never" - "she" was adopted
exclusively for censorship reasons.
In cash deposits, as well as in sex, the main thing - time to pull out ..
- He drinks almost like a camel.
- Do not underestimate the! Why - almost?
- I'm not belittled. He drinks as much, but not as rare.
Incidentally, in the light of recent developments can be said with certainty that
the old joke about the fact that you can only fuck people who cough, a
Rescued from the Matrix.
Expensive, but effective.
Doctor: Kashchenko VI
At the end of the appropriate operation, the patient is drawn to the surgeon:
- Doctor, why my operation took place without light?
- We are cut off for nonpayment.
- Okay. Can I now take on the light?
- Of course, only I'm not sure: this or that?
Turkmenbashi, announced that presidential elections in Turkmenistan will be held
in 2008-2010 year ... ... the birth of Turkmenbashi.
In St. Petersburg to maintain law and order during the celebrations of 300 years
9000 were sent to Moscow police. What was surprising
latter, when they found that virtually no one in town has
Moscow residence registration.
Interviewing for employment:
- What do you mean by "numerous publications in
Most popular Russian newspapers?
- I zapostil on www.anekdot.ru some good jokes.
"A good man should be a lot" - he thought Agent Smith, joyfully
rubbing his hands ...
Earth, 2015. Complete victory of artificial intelligence, rule the world
robots. People are destroyed, the only survivors Arnold Schwarzenegger,
because its terminators for his take.
I am drunk behind the wheel did not sit down ... Well, except to urge ...
In connection with the increasing number of disasters decided to rename
Aircraft Yak in HuYak.
From Potemkin Potemkin village to the city one three-hundredth anniversary.