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Before I share with people his own thoughts, believing that they have you
had accumulated at least two. Otherwise, nothing will.
Bladder - it is like the heart. He was not laid himself open.
In Russia, in addition to fools and roads, came three evils: gaskets,
caries and a dirty toilet!
In the shop:
- Give me a rat seasonings.
- Maybe rat poison?
- No, spices - rat poison in this winter are too hungry
Bill Gates gives interview to CNN. The reporter asks him to talk about difficult
and the long road to success and multi-billion status.
- Well, I worked hard. Of iron and designed the first radio
computer, then two, then ten ... For his computer, I have developed
the first operating system Windows ... And then one night me
was the devil and said that for every word will be the human obscene
pay me a penny ...
Sema Wiesenthal goes to heaven:
- God, why are they all here, but I spent all my life to have
catch them and condemn!
- Gold of the party, my friend, gold party!
Shahid comes to God and, of course, immediately falls to his knees with
cries of "Allahu Akbar!". God smiles and says Parisian:
- How much raz me explain ... Yahweh my name. Yahweh.
- To err is human ... - a distance began to talk with the commander
In response to the "Desert Storm" - two storms in the Gulf.
Yesterday over the territory of Lithuania was lost a new secret weapon.
Today can not find in Lithuania.
I do not know how it outside, and we have people who came to visit us
with a liter of vodka, is considered a relative.
One drunk to another:
- I have two news for you: good and very good.
With what to begin?
- With a good begin.
- I respect you.
- Is that all? Let's very good.
- I love you very much respect.
- Sivka Burka prophetic kaurka, stand in front of me like a leaf before grass.
- Ivan, you would pokonkretnee expressed as rise, and then we have the horses
the associative array something weaker.
If you beat a squirrel with a hundred meters just in the eye, then you have a very long
Georgian, Armenian and Uzbek argue - whose people have made a greater contribution to the Great
World War. Ara said: "Our Alexander Matrosyan closed its
body embrasure of the enemy bunker! "Grusin says:" But our pilot
Nicholas Gasteladze threw his burning aircraft on a pile of enemy
tanks! "Well, Uzbeks say:" This is all garbage! Our MAMA KURBAN so
then in Volgograd worth it! "
The soul then we have a broad, but here's budget narrowish ...
- The patient, with your state of health I do not advise you to drink.
- Then what about treatment? ..
Head can not love their subordinates, but can not they do not have.
If you offer a flexible work schedule, it means that you will
stoop at first whenever possible.
Journalist asked the archaeologist:
- How old is this Stone Age?
- 8-10 thousand.
- And how did you know?
- Well, I found the hatchet in a layer, whose age 8-10 thousand years.
- And how did you know the age of the layer?
- It's so obvious: in this layer are guns, whose age is 8.10
thousands of years ...
New condoms with the smell of burnt rubber ... Feel MACHO.
She gave birth to the queen of the night
Cole - son
Tole - daughter ....
"Only he who does nothing," - thought the hedgehog, dismounting
State Drug Control warns:
Do not buy drugs with it, it is dangerous to your health!
Remember, the head thinks faster than you! And while you just kept thinking about
good solution, he takes bad.
"I have to have two news: good and bad.
The bad: rising prices for gasoline ahead of the inflation rate!
Good: but inflation is behind rising gas prices! "
In the actions of our government, there have been movement of thought, and has
shows that this Brownian motion.
Indeed, if the Chancellor of Germany will be a woman, Putin will become of her
go to the bath?
Blonde can kompleksovat because of his intelligence, if it
small tits ...
Two blondes meet.
- You say you went to the theater with a lover? So what was it?
- Interesting. Tell me.
- We are faced with my husband.
He was also his mistress.
Beer "Klinskoje" does not promise you white teeth and fresh breath, but
ensures that you will not care what color your teeth and how to
- Masha, go to the cafe?
- Late, Lesha. I already Sergei.
Vain people ridicules blondes. Their brains are much improved these
He is able to process and transmit information at the level of nano-and even
- Give me the memory of $ 100!
- I do not understand!
- In a tough memory!
Before the football match in charge coach tells his players:
- Our future opponent thinks that we will win, because faster
runs better possession of the ball. Prove to him that this is not so! Today
training we pay special attention to technology shocks on his legs.
KIEV Ukraine Yulia Tymoshenko LIGHTNING
URGENTLY SEND TENTS Valenko PTA PTA INSTRUCTORS STOP
As an adequate translate into German EHF EHF PIDRAHUY Vopr SIGN
I CAN NOT do without DIOXINS Vopr Vopr SIGN SIGN Vopr SIGN
BONN GERMANY ANGELINA MERKEL
Schroeder, Putin congratulated on the successful outcome of the elections.
"It has begun!" - Schroeder thought ...
At the expense of GDP is not sure, but the price of petrol current government
it seems like double!
When driving up to gas stations and look at price, then I feel like
say: "And they gori blue flame!"
- Cold-how! When will include heating?
- Everything is strictly according to instructions. Heating will include, when the average
your body temperature drops below 8 degrees Celsius.
Bush called the CIA analysts and asked:
- Russia does not behave as before. What is your explanation?
Scratched analysts turnips:
- Putin strengthens the horizontal power.
Bush again asked them:
- Where does this contour come from?
- And this vertical collapsed ...
New Orleans flooded, al-Qaida seized a town in Iraq, Russia
ten together stood against Portugal, Sharapova all wets, Timoshenko
Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin was sitting in the Kremlin and feverishly whispers:
- Pret! Pret! Pret!
Most honest people live in Ukraine. There was still the case that they
planted someone a pig.
Chchert, I believe in love .. Ugh, bad kind .. Now I will cry
sleepless nights in the pillow, biting his lip, looking as she
talking with others, sing serenades under the window, put flowers
on the threshold, write anonymous letters with declarations of love, chalk
on the pavement in front of her windows - "I love you", give teddy bears,
spirits with spring scent, see her home, walking through dark alleys,
acquainted with her mom and to loose talk in the kitchen
mail, icq to find hidden links, drink less beer with friends,
ustraivatsya better-paying job, so let her ride
in those places, what she wants to go and listen, as she admires
birds in the botanical garden, cut on the bark of trees and its own name in the
heart, bear shopping, wait for hours while she tried on one blouse
store, clean the apartment to her arrival, look at her in the morning
without make-up and assert that it is the most beautiful in the world, go to the movies
dribbling on women's novels, to remember the date, month, date of birth and her
her hamster ... Everything fell out of love tries.
Dokapyvayas to the truth, you must Roesch somebody pit.
Scientists have proved that our vestibular system, for continuous
maintaining balance, eating a lot of resources of the brain. If it is disabled
unleash the potential, gives him enormous additional
opportunities; rising tone, the feeling of flight, rising
energy and the urge for sex, improves mood, feeling, etc.
Feeling a sense of truly fulfilling life.
Disabled vehicle balance quite easily, you can try for yourself
liter of vodka.
- And what is your hobby?
- I am a bibliophile.
- How's that?
- Well ... Fascinated with books.
- Ho! It would speak directly, without this inostranschiny - knigolozhets.
Odysseus returning home from the walls of Troy for twenty years. This stems from the,
Clearly, were the gods that have hampered him in every way ...
... At least, so he explained to his wife.
That said the peasant, in one ear from the other flies.
That woman said, in both ears and flies, flies from his mouth.
Only in our country is the phrase "illegal bandit formations."