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Some wiseacre gulped forfeits, the American shopping center and stopped two planes!
Logopaedic restaurant. Visitor: - Rimio and Julien in Italian, please! Waiter: - Isifinite, Lomio no. Can pilidlozhit, Matsu and Dublenskogo in luzski.
Passersby on the street turns to the girl: The girl-and show how to get Freedom Square. Girl: - Easy! Bends in half, squatting on his haunches and took a few steps vraskoryaku: - I just go to Liberty Square! Voice-over: - Maria - innate tsirkachka.
With the advent of Yushchenko to power all the apples in Donetsk was devoured by the American moth. (But it's true!)
FSB out on the trail of the organization was created in Moscow from human
As the press-service agency, the organization has
US-Ukrainian roots, for it says its name - "CHUB-ICE"
(unfrozen Cossack oseledtsy).
Shamil Basayev took responsibility for a power outage
Moscow. At the same time he declared himself responsible for the fall
Tunguska event and the Big Bang (the prelude to the formation
Times change ...
before the corner went to cast, and now to talk through
ANGLES BUT DOES NOT CHANGE! They still keep traces ....
- Tomorrow at Syktyvkar hydropower plant planned to happen
off .. doorman Sidorova.
- All real People want to say: drugs to no good arguments. They
bring to Lenin street, Building 15, Apartment 44, two bells, no
without straw ...
"02" - if it makes a man got into trouble. "03" - if it makes people hit the "02" "Undertaker-maker Bezenchuk" - if it makes people hit the "03"
"02" - if it makes a man got into trouble. "03" - if it makes people hit the "02"
By Stirlitz arrived in Berlin Kurier. Stirlitz asked what's new in
Moscow. Eurer hesitates, his instructions are not given, something to report. Then
Stirlitz said: "Well, do not want to talk, tell anecdote!" Courier
says a new anecdote: "Petya asked Vasily Ivanovich, what he
wash your hair? Vasily Ivanovich replied: "eggs, Petka, eggs! Petka:
"Well, you're an acrobat, Vasily Ivanovich! "
Stirlitz poglazhyvaya their hair thinking: "How would I not give what I
-This is Vasily Ivanovich, whom they have been looking at the bottom of the Urals!
Holy Monster (NA)
Gerasim-! Are you down in the mouth!
- Madame, we Zam-soaked Mumu!
- Gerasimos! What a joy, spoke! I've long told you:
Utopia this nasty dog! "Now you do not wriggle, Confess
immediately in love to his mistress!
- Maryna! Mranshe fooling mney melzya! A motom can!
Holy Monster (NA)
As you know, son Yuscha must be brought before a court for violations of rules
traffic and the smuggling of cars.
Begs the question: What will now be responsible half-elected People
President in the issue of criminal record in his family??
Deputy Minister of the Interior proposed that instead of catching terrorists
civilians, because, firstly, there are more, and, secondly, to catch
them much easier.
Inspired by the advertising:
"He knows who ..." kryahtyaschy voice is heard at the beginning of advertising.
Television viewers with a smile:
And we know that your advertising is not fucking with 5 minutes, and the entire, 7 and
at the same time - simultaneously on all channels. So we boldly going into this
time to relax and do housework, do not even waste time on
aimless channel switching.
The Commissar turns to recruits:
- Our voenkomatovsky doctor, I'm sorry, Jesus Christ!
- What's so kind?
- No, but he has the blind see and the lame walk!
We buy party grenades.
Attention, new tariffs for mobile!
"good bullshit!" - Every minute, twice as much as the previous!
"PLUS good bullshit!" - Every second, twice as much as the previous!
Football was born in England, and was buried in Azerbaijan!
What happens if an intercontinental ballistic missile
"Tomahawk" put Windows? There are two options:
1) hangs in the air.
2) will return to base for the upgrade.
- Colleague, and you know at the President's son pidaras.
- What are you talking about? Where did you get that idea?
- Well, you think of yourself, a colleague, recently President Ukrania, speaking on
television, said that his son, friends presented posh BMW
latest model, platinum and mobile-luxurious apartment in the center
Kiev, and who is he then?
- Did so, pidaras.
If you think you're ugly, you will go down in the Moscow subway, sit
in the car and look at his reflection in the window. And you realize that you still
(c) J. K.
-What can I do
Translation: I'm ready to whisk vodka
- Just Do it!
Translation: Here is a draft
In response to a domestic hit rap singer Serioga Black boomer, one of
African-American rap group prepared to release a remake of songs working
called "White b dead! .
Men are so in need of sex that even the demand for women with
This pilot should be in life "to land the plane", "build
Inspector "and" grow hemorrhoids ...
Bitter comes to Lenin, and Lenin on the jerk in the toilet sits.
A knock at the door.
- Well, who else??
- Volodymyr I., it Gorki. Book that's written, "Mother"
called, you brought.
- Kniiigu? Well, let's quickly it slips under the door!
About! About! What a timely book!
Yushchenko has decided it's time to start blaming the mirror.
Achipyatka: "Plevatelny pool" ...
If the word BREAD make 4 errors - pick up a beer ...
If the word traffic police make five mistakes, you get garbage ...
Last weighty argument in conversation: - "Your word, Comrade Mauser
(Makarov and Kalashnikov, and others) ...
Many "patriots" regret that break with tradition. For example, future
electoral headquarters of parties and presidential candidates, in their opinion,
be only in the Kremlin!
There before goskontsertnym hall "Russia" (in the center of Moscow) area stars
- Runner with the names of famous artists ... The same in other matters, as all
roads in Russia and in appearance and in the case ...
From the talk: In my youth I, too, dreamed of and wanted to become a pilot. One
once even flew ...
Friday begins when your signature for the second time in the magazine
After a long wait is finally resumed flights of American
space shuttles. Shuttle Discovery
safely docked to the International Space Station. Scheduled
implementation of large volumes of important scientific research. Research
surface of the shuttle manipulator with a camera for damage.
Access to space for the astronauts' visual inspection of the shuttle and the search for places
with loose insulation tiles. The flight to the ISS Discovery to
crew of the International Space Station was able to see the shuttle and
try to discover the injury site. Run pilot
microsatellite, designed to search for cracks and chips in the plating
shuttle. Visit the American spacecraft of large terrestrial
telescopes, to detect damage on it.
Unfortunately, the time allotted to these vital research
limited, since the primitive Russian Progress spacecraft could not
deliver to the ISS is the amount of food, water and air, which
necessary for long-term work of seven American astronauts and those
5 tons of cargo, which brought the shuttle, composed of parts and tools
necessary for its repair.
After docking with the station, the captain of the shuttle, a female astronaut Eileen
Collins made a long welcoming speech, in which
extolled the power of American technology and cooperation with Russia in
ISS commander Sergei Krikalev, gave a very brief response speech.
Unfortunately, with a translation and encountered some difficulties over it
now work the best linguists USA.
From the Office of God says that in the near future, Bill Gates
zakantsivaesya license for the right to be Bill Gates.
Kiev -... mother of Russian cities!
> The mantra which repeats the whole of Russia:
> "Peter ... PiterPiTerPiTerpiTerpi ... patience ..."
"Darkness TmaTmaTMaTMatMatMat ... ... Mother ... (your)"
(c) S. Voznesensky.
> Terrorism - bastard child of friendship of peoples.
Terrorism - bastard child of friendship of peoples, if these people are friends with each
other in the ass
- My dear, but you could give me the pleasure of at least twice
- Probably could.
- And three?
- Hm-m-m ... , In principle, why not.
- And four?
- Honey, well, not every week, I claim the salary!
- The Kremlin has no relation to the emergence of anti-fascist
Nashi "- said the representative of the Reich Chancellery President Putin
at a rally Gauleiters this movement.
Yushchenko on Maidan obeschal that Ukrainians will be free and rich ... And
honestly vypolnyaet their promises from the CO's family.
After the inventory carried out at the insistence of ukrainskix zhurnalistov,
found that Yushchenko's family is the most impoverished in the Ukraine.
- Remember, son, not a hundred rubles, and a hundred friends!
(c) the Free Friendly Spirit Slava
One Shout otdolzhil car, the second - Mobil, the third - apartment ,..... Ckazhite,
and who, blyat, otdalzhivaet son Yushchenko sneakers?
(c) the Free Friendly Spirit Slava
Fly-fly lobe, through the west to east through the north, through south
come back, making a circle, only kocneshsya you land, be in my opinion were:
"Great, let me go, the magic miracle grass" ...
Even the blue sometimes see life in rosy light.