Latest jokes | Random jokes | Top jokes

New best jokes, funniest anecdotes

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50
2. From sooobrazheny political correctness in the U.S. black and white chess replaced blue-green ... Oops The blue color can not understand. Next - not the red and brown, green, purple (or even offend drunks), yellow and orange (residents Asians), blue (the color of the valiant naval), gray - Offend dropouts, you know, even in striped and checked (!) can not. From sooobrazheny political correctness in the U.S. color chess set next - Spotted in the scar.
Joke #22621 —  
 
0
 
in connection with recent events, UN Secretary-General took to match the position, and also changed the name to Annan on anal.
Joke #22620 —  
 
0
 
Yes, not lucky Muscovites with Chubais, For the first few years they have lost electricity. But as luck Northerners. For the first few years they have repaired the electricity.
Joke #22619 —  
 
0
 
Why is Russia selling raw materials abroad, and then transfers abroad and money? Russia concerned over the development of world economy. Will take it to Russia in the European Union? And who needs poor relatives?
Joke #22618 —  
 
0
 
In Moscow, Dmitry Rogozin, a benefit was held in the play "Kill the dragon. The dragon on the bow did not come out.
Joke #22617 —  
 
0
 
As we learned yesterday, was a worldwide contest asshole. Respectable second place was taken ... you know who!
Joke #22616 —  
 
0
 
of these radio intercepts (Iraqi guerrillas writing a letter to Rumsfeld): please send us a new target, and then your old travel only on the belly, is very difficult to get
Joke #22615 —  
 
0
 
Why Jews do not get to tell anecdote
Joke #22614 —  
 
0
 
Georgia hit the boy in a Turkish brothel for homosexuals, fuck it
Day two, a week, he can not stand calling Georgian president-wah,
Miho so that's what you call male friendship between Georgians and Turks.
Joke #22613 —  
 
0
 
Latvia and Lithuania also advanced the claim to each other .....
Joke #22612 —  
 
0
 
- Julia, why do you wheel on his head?
- But sho did not know?
Joke #22611 —  
 
0
 
Vladimir Putin after a hard day to go to his wife in bed:
- "I'll be brief ... ...! "
Joke #22429 —  
 
0
 
In light of recent events in Europe the color "orange" revolution, all
becomes less similar to the color orange. And more and more - in color
"Children of surprise" ...
Joke #22428 —  
 
0
 
We solve the problem of successor Vladimir Putin.

As shown scientists, Vladimir Putin - is Czarevitch Alexei, miracle
escaped during the shooting of the royal family. So what Vladimir Putin
is the legitimate heir to the throne of Russia Empire.
Joke #22427 —  
 
0
 
If the shop, my wife asked, do you like this sable coat --
before you answer at least to tell the ... ten salaries.
Joke #22426 —  
 
0
 
I think advertising beauty salons will be more effective if
slogan: "Article under-lose weight" vycheknut in the 3 rd letter of the word "n" and "d".
Joke #22424 —  
 
0
 
In the shuttle bus driver:
- What does the red light?
- No time for puzzles!
Joke #22423 —  
 
0
 
When people are asked about home-almost all call their country. But
only in our country do not make mistakes. Because the question: "Where is your
homeland? ", they replied:" In the cunt! "
Joke #22422 —  
 
0
 
came as something Eeyore, Winnie the Pooh and Piglet to the rabbit, and on his desk
gnawed bones strewn on the plate. Asked Eeyore, whose bone -
pig replied rabbit. 2 hours: Winnie-the-rabbit: "well sat,
Only Piglet left early (on the table still littered with gnawed
bone).
Joke #22421 —  
 
0
 
- They say that your wife log.
- No wonder, if it has dimensions :90-90-90
Joke #22420 —  
 
0
 
Sensation! Putin has bequeathed to the Baltic countries at their ears.
Joke #22419 —  
 
0
 
For reasons of political correctness in the U.S. and the European Union decided to abandon
names of colors - black, red, yellow and white, replacing them with the words:
African-American color, the color of the Latin-American, Asian and color
Anglo-American color, respectively.
Joke #22418 —  
 
0
 
Komusutra - is in our
Joke #22417 —  
 
0
 
- And what has become of the Fat Man, who had beer advertised on TV?
- Drunk.
Joke #22416 —  
 
0
 
Dog Chihuahua-Hua per day can run Doha-hua.
Joke #22415 —  
 
0
 
Were you ever in the room Vova? That's where x ** in! That's where x ** in!
Joke #22414 —  
 
0
 
One man phoned a friend, asked: "What are you doing?".
A friend says: "watch the telly -" The Chronicles of slaughter department.
A man asks: "What were you today?"
A friend says: "As always about chronic. Larina Pro news, news
Dukalisa.
Joke #22413 —  
 
0
 
How to break up the country's economy for 100 days?
How to make meat unaffordable for the majority of the population for 100 days?
How to bring the country to energy crisis in 100 days?
How to undermine investor confidence and cause a reduction in investment in 100
days?
How contrive to make people poorer, by adopting the most
socially-oriented budget of all budgets?
And much more fun to read science-fiction program
Yushchenko "At the meeting people" edited by George Soros.

http://censor.net.ua/
Joke #22412 —  
 
0
 
Saeima categorically demanded that Russia immediately
apologies for the brazen occupation of his penalty area during
football match Russia-Latvia, the recognition result of the match illegal and
infringe the rights of the proud people of Latvia.
Joke #22411 —  
 
0
 
- Say, that's Tymoshenko was withdrawn in the women's magazine "Elle", it will
her to become President of Ukraine?
- Help.
- Tell me, if she'll in the men's magazine "Playboy", it will
her to become President of Ukraine?
- This will help her become a intern in the White House ...

http://censor.net.ua/
Joke #22410 —  
 
0
 
Man comes to a psychologist and says:
- Yesterday, on a visit, after a very drunk, I felt not
in their element.
- And how do you feel?
- Yes for the salad! I would have never put this.
Joke #22409 —  
 
0
 
There is a suggestion that the name of the wine "monk's soul" the word "soul" - is
Gerundive!
Joke #22408 —  
 
0
 
Happiness for men - this morning when he goes to the mistress of joy, and
evening still happily go to my wife!
Joke #22407 —  
 
0
 
- So, guys, our secretary Masha Seleznevoi addition to the
family. All are renting for 100 rubles. and DNA analysis.
Joke #22406 —  
 
0
 
- Pinocchio! Let tyapnem in place with sherry!
- No! I have tomorrow morning to pass on the analysis of birch sap!
Joke #22405 —  
 
0
 
- This operation "Tide" or ... trinitrohlorbutan nitrogen dioxide!
Joke #22404 —  
 
0
 
- Interestingly, the bears take on his paw?
- And what would they sucked in the winter?
Joke #22403 —  
 
0
 
- Knock-knock! Open up, police!
- A nafik are you closed?
Joke #22402 —  
 
0
 
- Which course?
- First.
- And I - the fifth! Well, let's for a beer.
- Do not go.
- For beer, chase, greenhorn!
- Do not go!
- Then I'm with you on a different talk ... (kneels down) Well, go
for beer, well, please ...
Joke #22401 —  
 
0
 
Dentists know that 8 out of 10 children in Russia caries. Council therefore
New toothpaste from caries.
And sociologists know that 8 out of 10 families in Russia and money on products not
enough. Therefore, dentists recommend to shut up and go straight to hell.
Joke #22399 —  
 
0
 
- Sounds like somehow Ivan Tsarevich to the crystal coffin, and there is a princess ...
abdomen. Where to kiss? ...
Joke #22398 —  
 
0
 
Builders accidentally bricked up the owner's cat in the wall.
Hostess: - Well, show that you have us here naremontirovali?
Builders: - First, answer me one question: would you kill
Rights, like that for nothing, for nothing, because of the cat, for example.
- I could kill only for Stalin! And where is my cat? Stalin!
Kitty, kitty, kitty ... Stalin!
Joke #22397 —  
 
0
 
New phone tariff "Dima Beeline. The first 10 seconds is disgusting, and then
accustomed.
Joke #22396 —  
 
0
 
- Sidorov childhood studied zoology. Recently, he tried to cross
horse and juniper. The resulting ... kick rescued
any desire to continue the experiment.
Joke #22395 —  
 
0
 
Because electricity disruptions in Moscow World Cup qualifying match
Football Russia-Latvia was held in St. Petersburg. In the daytime.
Just in case. (Vasil Lucas)
Joke #22394 —  
 
0
 
- Where shoving, the steamer?
- Why am I the steamer?
- Are you still studying at the institute? In a pair of walking? So you ship.
Joke #22393 —  
 
0
 
- I yesterday with his girlfriend in the city all night walking.
Everything was in poetry: night, street, lamp, drugstore ..
Joke #22392 —  
 
0
 
TV series "Santa-Matrix. Summary of previous series. Neo
works in South Korea. America bombed South Korea. Neo catches the bomb and
sells them to Iraq. 2 series in a row on the screen running green numbers - it
Rigid German Porn private. At this time on a ranch in
Morpheus-Kepvella. Trinity falls from ladders, loses memory of the child and
virginity.
Joke #22391 —  
 
0
 
Because all of which broadcast "Good night, kids" beasts, then to their
names, it was decided to add the prefix "zoo". So, for example, ZooHryusha,
ZooStepashka, sounds good. But Phil .. Phil lost his job at ORT.
Joke #22390 —  
 
0
 
- And you are here Manneken Pis not seen?
- No.
- Show?
Joke #22389 —  
 
0
 
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311