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When worried conscience - Vodka helps compress.
Firstonx
Joke #29500 —  
 
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Yesterday in the chamber hanged recidivist Sidorov, who was sentenced to
10-year-old reading works Darya Dontsova.
Joke #29499 —  
 
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- Dad, what is intimacy?
- This is when my mother fucking no witnesses!
- And if the witnesses?
- Then get on the forehead of Peeping!
Joke #29498 —  
 
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Regional air travel in the far north between the two rigs.
Kukuruznik unexpectedly kolbasilo in all directions. A guy from the salon
runs into the cabin and sees the two in the ass drunk drivers. By Gender ride
Two empty bottles of vodka.
Pilot:
- Naman, man. We secret test pilots. On instructions from KB
experience, Skok people can drink at the controls of the latest
jet fighter.
- And then, just a bottle at his brother?
Pilot gets his foot out from under the chair and pulls another box on the wheel itself:
- So we do and went to the subsonic.
Joke #29497 —  
 
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Life is not successful? He devoted himself to the protection of white rhino Rhodesia. Or
drinking directly to your home.
Joke #29496 —  
 
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The wife of the department alone Fagot. She even mascara and lipstick home takes,
so as not stolen.
Joke #29495 —  
 
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- What is the antonym for the word "feminine"?
- Feminism.
(C) Stephen
Joke #29494 —  
 
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- Released in the morning from the office and hung it on a chair jacket, so that all
thought that I did not last long. In the evening he returned, and they give me a prize and asked
longer come.
- So, was fired. A prize-then what?
- Yes the jacket. Solid, say, let still hung. Promise even
nachalskoe outweigh the chair.
Joke #29493 —  
 
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Be vigilant! Now, e-mail addresses, come
communication with the proposal to make a million dollars. Do not buy --
a fraud, more than 800 thousand dollars you earn.
Joke #29492 —  
 
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When the soul scratching cats - they are, this shit buried ...
http://internet-portal.ru
Joke #29491 —  
 
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- Why are you so angry? With broom fell?
Joke #29490 —  
 
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- Little Johnny, so tomorrow your father was back from me!
- For what, Marvana?
- Not at all, but why! ... Actually, for anyone! ... Yes! And tell him that
possible and without champagne!
Studios.
Joke #29489 —  
 
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The question of the defendant:
- Why did you kill the citizen to?
- First, we wanted to just beat him and take away cell phone-n, but when
pocket by lying to the citizens fell Siemens A 35 ...
Joke #29488 —  
 
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Dear passengers, the aircraft Tu-134 sits. Who has charge of
TU-134, please go to the cockpit.
Joke #29295 —  
 
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There are 4 soldiers: Turks, French, American and Russian.
They begin to drink ....
Turk:
- Let's drink to our carpets - they are the best in the world!
Frenchman:
- Let's drink to our women - they are the most beautiful in the world!
American:
- Let's drink to our anti-missile ustonovki - they are the most accurate
in the world!
Russian (some thought):
- Duck let us drink to the Russian soldier, who on your Turkish
fuck your carpets of French women with such precision and accuracy,
the Americans could not even dream!
Joke #29294 —  
 
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Russia not Asian as sex without imagination.
Russia in Europe as a member of the ...
Joke #29293 —  
 
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There is a dispute Russian, German and a Frenchman - who the people stronger. German says:
- Here is our newly Hans teeth pulled on the rope truck at 5 meters!
Frenchman:
- And we have one athlete aircraft moved 20 meters!
Russian:
- And our man-stands shelves and pulled the plane with such speed that
he took off!
Joke #29292 —  
 
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Airplane is flying. Suddenly the lights in the cockpit displays "Critical
malfunction. "One pilot is to calm the passengers, and another
calmly hitting his fist on the dashboard - the plane is stuck
air. Do not hurry, two hours repairing, then again with his fist on the dashboard
panel - the plane flies on, and happily sat down.
Colleagues asked him:
- And how did you do it?
- And this I remembered youth. I once worked as elevator operator.
Joke #29291 —  
 
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There are something like two friends, but one of them looks very gloomy.
Essence another wondered what had happened.
- Yes, fired me with a very good oplachivemoy work.
- And where did you raboal?
- Yes spermobanke.
- Why fired?
- Yes ..... drink at work ....
Joke #29290 —  
 
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Being smart does not hurt and does not hurt a fool not hurt
how to be painfully stupid or painfully clever.
Joke #29289 —  
 
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Small backscratching can make a big career.
Firstonx
Joke #29288 —  
 
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And drop dignity - a shame, and bear - hard.
Firstonx
Joke #29287 —  
 
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The more expensive than condoms, the higher fertility.
(c) izhstyle.livejournal.com
Joke #29286 —  
 
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Mother in law's funeral. In-law with a thoughtful look says:
"Usually, death takes the best ...", then whisper
adds: "... but this time she successfully missed.
(c) izhstyle.livejournal.com
Joke #29285 —  
 
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- And let's try to become a great power! Let us drink, learn
respect for women and, eventually, stop stealing!
- Come on!
- So, not whether we lose ourselves as a nation?
Taken from bigler.ru
Joke #29283 —  
 
0
 
Down the street riding technological disaster, driven by a man
factor.
Joke #29282 —  
 
0
 
In two of the most docile circus bear died from diabetes.
Joke #29281 —  
 
0
 
- Well, I congratulate you! As you are born a new life!
- Doctor ... but I'm a man!
- Yes? Well actually intestinal worms in it somehow LinkBacks ...
Joke #29280 —  
 
0
 
Appeal to the International Mother's Day:
Long live Mother Russia - the most obscene in the world!
Rowda
Joke #29279 —  
 
0
 
Ideal world - a world in which women understand that sex
created not the brain, and most other bodies!
Joke #29278 —  
 
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GAI stops "Lada" with the obvious intention to fill up your pocket.
Traced brief talks on the price side, one of which looks
quite another, separate.
In parting, the driver, trying to suppress anger, asked:
- Comrade Sergeant, can abstract question?
- ?????
- Can we call an inspector to a goat?
- No, of course. He's the person the state.
- And can I say goat "Comrade Sergeant?
- Law is not forbidden.
- Well then good-bye, comrade sergeant.
Joke #29277 —  
 
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I am not a shaman, but a tambourine nastuchat I could.
(c) izhstyle.livejournal.com
Joke #29276 —  
 
0
 
At the exam. Instructor:
- Your name?
- If you rent, then - Anna Karenina.
Joke #29274 —  
 
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What is the hand brake - is an Estonian cat!
Joke #29273 —  
 
0
 
There are two tennis balls. One asks the other:
- Do you know who we are?
- No.
- We eggs from robots.
Joke #29272 —  
 
0
 
From the financial reports:
"The steel market did not sell steel.
www.elgera.narod.ru
Joke #29271 —  
 
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We have no political snowdrops, there are political brown cap boletus ...
Joke #29270 —  
 
0
 
Most of all against the ban of Georgian and Moldovan wines to serve those
who prefer to drink wine French.
Joke #29269 —  
 
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Still interesting: vertical of power in Russia stands or hanging? ..
Joke #29268 —  
 
0
 
To equip the army of Russia was bought by a large party of ladies
handbags, of testing them climbs to 2 times more subjects
than in an army knapsack.
Joke #29267 —  
 
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In connection with the workload of the underground, the Moscow government
is concerned with the bill, which even days in the subway allowed
girls on odd - the boys.
Joke #29266 —  
 
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Curse:
I hope you install Windows Vista from floppies!
Joke #29265 —  
 
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Kitaitsev easier to consider cubic meters.
Joke #29264 —  
 
0
 
Road can handle the road, and roads - crawling.
Firstonx
Joke #29263 —  
 
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- Doctor, tell me, will I live?
- Yes, you will live.
- Hurray, I will live with a doctor!

Joke #29262 —  
 
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In confession.
- Mr. Pastor, my wife went away for the weekend, and I slept with the maid.
- How many times?
- How many times? But listen, Mr. Pastor, I have come to
confess, and not to brag!
Joke #29261 —  
 
0
 
Putin:
- What steps are being taken in relation to the Georgians?
Fradkov:
- Permanent ban wine, closed Georgian restaurants and
cleared of Georgians markets!
Putin:
- That's good. And what about gas?
Fradkov:
- Gas chambers will work with tomorrow!
Joke #29260 —  
 
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Katya Lel makes cuffs son.
- You will listen to my mother? you will hear my mother?
- Buuuduu!
Teleki includes: Syusi-Musi ....
- On, listen to my mother, and then nobody wants to listen.
Joke #29259 —  
 
0
 
The second day is the collision of two aircraft in the skies over
Estonia.
Joke #29258 —  
 
0
 
Marriage - a cowardly escape from the bachelor problems.
Joke #29257 —  
 
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