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The best way to lose weight Pinocchio was always a plane of Pope Carlo.
God created man in His own image. And where is this man?
In the hospital with a dentist. The doctor knocks on healthy teeth and immediately
- Well, there is a difference?
- Of course, doctor.
It takes 5 minutes ... all repeats ...
The doctor asks:
- Difference is?
- Yes, doctor ...
- And what's the difference?
- It sounds fake ...
- What distinguishes the real from the virtual sex?
- Real - it develops when the heart muscle, and the virtual --
when developing the right biceps .....
- Oh, Lesch come! Finally, we can do our favorite thing.
- Wait until Lesch leave.
Science News. Ministry of Education issued new textbooks with errors
which will study the new generation of schoolchildren.
- Lads! October on the nose! It's time to take the winter!
A couple of days:
- Hello, boss, greetings from Peter! Winter took, but at the same time post and telegraph!
- Mace! I had in mind a set of winter tires for my "Boomer"!
In honor of the anniversary WHA gives all buyers Lada discounts
Services or set of car accessories - towing
cable and warning triangle.
Carpets in the shop "The old Hottabych." Excellent carpets for fuck-tibidoh!
- Boy, as well as your name?
- My parents always wanted a kitten.
Subject writings: "The image of the mother in the sms-messages."
- I see you Muscovite ...
- No, just full.
Literature - a whore graphomania.
In the basement Darya Dontsova were found ten thousand monkeys with
They say bin Laden overeaten spinach ...
- Why Luzhkov's birthday celebrated in the arena?
- I hoped that Sobchak will go .... a stable home ...
Thailand coup: instead of "69" will now be "96".
When his father - rickshaw, mother - geisha, and his son Moishe, this is not a tragedy
Eastern family, a real tragedy when his father Moishe, mother - rickshaw,
a son - Geisha ...
In Stockholm crashed Carlson. We consider two versions: the bad
weather conditions and pilot error. The final conclusion will be
published after decoding black boxes.
Gaskets Albatross - wingspan of up to 3 meters.
- Tomorrow I'll go to the doctor.
- To the doctor? Are you sick?
- I really hope that ill. Otherwise, I really feel so worthless
Mom came with 18-year-old daughter out of town.
boarded the bus - but as an evil, the bus is overloaded. had to go standing up.
One good man, gave her mother a place, but the daughter remained standing.
25 minutes, one tutor said: "girl, take me to
daughter turned to her mother for advice, as they say to do?
mother says: "Sit down of course, still 1.5 hours to go." daughter of the village.
2 minutes uncle said: "Sorry, I should climb to the right
pocket, a cigarette fix. "reaches into his pocket, adjusts ...
a minute later: "Sorry, again I want in my pocket, matches
climbs into the left pocket, adjusts ...
and one grandfather in the back said: "girl, sit better on my knees,
I no longer smoke. "
From the zone of the Chernobyl nuclear power station closures was trying to escape a local resident ...
Blocking detachments opened fire on the attacker. The body of the detained soldiers
counted 12 holes. Fortunately, they all turned out to be anal.
Total of three minutes was enough doctor Kurpatovu in order to prove
stop the traffic cops that he - a mere nobody, and make it
Chef - secretary:
- What are you doing on Sunday?
Secretary (with hope in his voice):
- Then let me remind you that today is not Sunday!
Because ads new Center for cloning:
- Today, we have increased the number of our customers by 300 percent.
If in the morning, you stumbled and fell down the stairs at night, you are hit by a car
evening you were fired from their jobs, but at night morons neighbors included Ramstein --
Think you very lucky. Neighbors might include some pop!
- You elected, Neo! "- Said Morpheus.
- I'm an idiot! - Neo said, stopping his hand a cloud of bullets and slipping on
1. Fell fork - comes the girl.
2. Fell fork and teeth bent - comes a girl with crooked legs.
3. Fell fork and teeth dull - come blonde.
- Natasha, you got me wrong!
- That I did not understand? I perfectly understand all of it! You treat me
like a dog: Bring, bring, bring, bring.
- Natasha, you're wrong!
- What am I doing wrong? Here is how I will take a stick!
- Natasha, yuk!
In Africa, where the zebra crossing will crush, there and go across the road.
Husband and wife lie in bed.
- Honey, what do you think I'm beautiful?
- Here's just so, and everything?
- Yes, you're beautiful.
- Yes, you're beautiful. As the mare sivaya! Is that it?
- No, you're not mare!
- Thank you, dear! Do not goat! Good night!
Abkhazian comes to the grocery store and asks:
- Girl, what have you got?
- And with what it eats?
- Since bread!
Purchases sausage, bread, sat down to eat on a bench, took out the sausage, past
ran the dog, grabbed the sausage and running.
Abkhazian after her:
- Run, Run, bitch, look like without bread is going to ...
I wonder why so we have to muse, and to web-designers Creative?
- Hey, stand up, we have a local cattle ..
- Ugh, that gang!
That they might live better, we need to work better!
If you see hastening to Moscow on a black car with the included flasher --
miss, Do not block the road, a man in a hurry to surrender .....
- Vasili Ivanovich, enough to drink, but it will clanks.
- Here, a pancake, even a fever - and she is white.
- Mom, I never again will I eat mushrooms.
- I promised them yesterday.
Announcement. School Ivan Susanin. Teaching in Polish.
In the sex-shop seller girlie-kid:
- And you are here why the hell do you want?
- Won addition, on the top shelf with a vibrator!
- And this, John, riding. It now honor of our mayor.
- Your mayor - a horse??
Announcement in the dean's office:
"Attention students! Changed the rules examinations. In this session
passing exams is as follows:
1-th time - Staff
2 nd time - the Commission of the teachers
3rd time - the Commission from the district military office "
Selling T-34. Anticor, Lockers, alarm, Mp3, not broken, do not
Dyed. Apply to lieutenant colonel.
American Gay returned from Russia.
- Well, what? - Worried friends - They say there are terrible to us,
you were not beaten?
- What you! There are gays still better than us! There for them even
is indulgence in laws!
- If you see someone passing on the yellow or the oncoming lane,
necessarily tell about him: "Well, one more fag go!"
- And we Lehoy Th something in the New Year overestimated their strength ... I went to the forest
- For amphetamines!
Power button electric ...
We have a steep supermarket. We even rats with carts running around.
The best contraceptive - is the brain!
Fishing in full swing!
Already and bait
With difficulty Unlike snacks ..