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Transitional period - in kindergarten did not play hide and seek
and have not played in a gay parade.
Joke #41192 —  
 
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- Gogi, if y tebya forehead viros x # d, how long it should be,
to you it videl?
- Paul Maitre how seychas, Vakho.
- Nat, though Maitre, still not uvidel would patamushto eggs pered eyes
viseli be.
Joke #41191 —  
 
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You know what women's logic is different from men?
The absence of logic!
Joke #41190 —  
 
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To the question "Which drink you love most?" he grimly replied:
"Mineral water. Cold. Morning."
Joke #41188 —  
 
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I caught a guy goldfish, and she tells him a human voice:
- Let me go, please, and I for the three will fulfill your desires!
The man thought, and said:
- First: I want to be stopped worrying alcoholic
gallyutsionatsii. Second ... Op-pa, but where have you gone, golden fish??
Joke #41187 —  
 
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Wife with a worried look comes to flowers and said:
- Just imagine, in my Pelargonium whitefly.
- What - what ...?
- Yes trahikarpus ill, I say.
Joke #41186 —  
 
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News Justice. From 1 March this year for prisoners introduced
probation. If a prisoner for three months work in the camps show itself
as a good worker, then it is left to work for the remainder of the term.
Joke #41185 —  
 
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Discussing the other day about the girls weightlifter. They all say that they
not afraid to walk at night. A day something terrible!
http://smile2000.ru
Joke #41184 —  
 
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- Son, Carlson came to us!
- Dad, Finish is paint the floor!
http://nasnet.ru/
Joke #41183 —  
 
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Fire journalist:
- If you arrived at the fire, you feel that there is something fried ...
- That the cause of fire was careless use of fire in
cooking shish kebab - interrupted him a journalist.
- No, - shakes his head fireman - that means we have suffered.
Joke #41181 —  
 
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The company Gazprom and the factory "Red October", a joint
project, prepare a new generation of candy, which soon
decade will suck all of Europe.
Joke #41180 —  
 
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Putin - Bush:
- Tell me, George, what do you Missile Defense in Europe?
- Exclusively against missiles of North Korea.
- But Korea is a completely different side and their missiles must fly to
you across the Pacific Ocean, rather than via Europe.
- So there is a dictator Kim Jong Il!
- So what?
- What! Worth it just blinking - and the missiles will fly to us not
across the Pacific Ocean, and in Europe!
Joke #41179 —  
 
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American modesty, straightforwardness English, Russian
forethought, the elegance of the German and French intransigence --
All this inspires confidence in the future.
Joke #41178 —  
 
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Russia comes to the reception to the doctor.
- Something I feel bad, not health ...
- Yes, sir, let's see what you have here ... So ... Yes you have the same GASES! But still
tumor - in the Kremlin ... Bad deeds.
- What should I do?
- Amputate Belarus - and so loose, hanging - barely holding together.
- Doctor, but maybe not necessary?
- NATO, Russia, NATO!
Joke #41177 —  
 
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Russia. 2200. The lesson of history.
- In the 21 century the primitive population of Russia was engaged in subsistence
farming and gathering ... Cars at the car factories.
Joke #41176 —  
 
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Pain in the stewardess. The captain invited my friend, not
stewardess, her substitute.
The aircraft accelerates on the strip, the captain said a brand new:
- Tell passengers that take off.
That takes the microphone:
- Dear passengers, now, our plane will fly in the air ...
Flight difficult to obtain.
Joke #41175 —  
 
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Summer. Peter. Nightclub dumped two Ku Kluxers.
First admiringly:
- What a fine night!
Second:
- Main - white!
Joke #41174 —  
 
0
 
Gifts to give love to buy - hate.
(c) izhstyle.livejournal.com
Joke #41173 —  
 
0
 
A man and his wife arrived at the place where they were 25 years ago had a honey
month.
- Darling, what you thought when I first saw my naked body?
- I want to suck your tits dry and fuck you up losses
you mind.
- And now? (she undressed)
- I see, I did.
Translated Len
Joke #41172 —  
 
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If you ice cleaning money hand over fist, having attended to a number of challenges were
opportunity to do the same thing differently, standing in idleness, one of
They ogreet you over the head with his empty shovel.
Joke #41171 —  
 
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Who has heard the ringing of an alarm in the early morning on Monday, Togo
trumpet hour Judgment - not frighten.
Firstonx
Joke #41170 —  
 
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Live a full life - this is when delishsya happiness with another misfortune
give the enemy, and the care and forsake him.
Joke #41169 —  
 
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The patient comes to the doctor.
Doctor:
- You the last time I had?
Patient:
- Eight years ago. You are then told that I would live six months
and prescribe treatment.
Doctor:
- Apparently, I have appointed the wrong treatment.
Joke #41168 —  
 
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The village went to the river to bathe. Divided, guys - left,
girls - to the right. The girls dress up in the bushes - the noise, the laughter is.
- Oh, girls, guys are spying on us!
- Oh, girls, and boys have a swim!
- Oh, girls, take a look, but they are also naked!
- Oh, girls, we now let's go into the water, and they ca-a-ak pounce!
- Oh, girls from villages far away and not hear our cries.
Then one girl says:
- And let's climb up the river, there is a quiet backwater, no one - and
safely swim.
The total silence, all turning and looking puzzled at the girl:
- And what are we here, came to bathe ??!!!
Joke #41167 —  
 
0
 
... try new crackers taste dental office!
Joke #41166 —  
 
0
 
In Russian roads, there are two evils:
1. Flasher.
2. Speaking on his mobile phone blonde behind the wheel, thoughtfully
coloring lips.
Joke #41165 —  
 
0
 
In the police do not keep bad people, there are people in general do not hold.
Joke #41163 —  
 
0
 
Himself as a body - do not be surprised that shove penny!
Joke #41161 —  
 
0
 
Anecdote is narrated by an Englishman (free translation).
The bar offers a Brit to tell an anecdote about stupid Americans.
Hearing this, it is suitable for a healthy representative
zvezdanuto striped country and said:
- Listen, friend, look at me, I champion Florida on kikg-boxing --
shows the next table - are my friends Mike and John, Mike --
captain of the New York rugby team, and John boxer and serves
Marines. Do you still want to tell your anecdote!
Briton looked at them and said:
- You know, I changed my mind - feel like three times to repeat!
Zorrrro
Joke #41160 —  
 
0
 
Yesterday, three American astronauts went out into the open space, with
twice - because of problems in the bathroom ...
Joke #41159 —  
 
0
 
According to surveys, the greatest number of people wishing to start a new life Monday
observed on Tuesdays.
Joke #41158 —  
 
0
 
- Darling, I'm so tired - we're going for two hours!
- Have patience, my dear. Soon halt.
- I can not! I rubbed shoulders a backpack, sneakers are tight, the sun is hot!
- Well, what can I do, my love?
- Can you get out of a backpack?
Joke #41157 —  
 
0
 
Today I stopped by traffic police inspector Ivanova LA, and personal example
proved that, contrary to logic, women also have pidarasy.
Joke #41156 —  
 
0
 
Husband and wife in bed.
- "My dear, let's again.
- Honey, I can not.
- I think that you're drinking too much beer, and you begin
dominant female hormones.
- And do not you think that female hormones begin to dominate because
the fact that I wash the dishes, cook meals, wash-stroked clothes, tidy
room?
Joke #41155 —  
 
0
 
Announcement: Any photos of all types of documents, as well as all types of
documents on any photo.
Joke #41154 —  
 
0
 
A guy runs home and cries to his wife:
- Get undressed and in bed, going to have sex, and if you had
lover, I feel.
Fuck wife with caution:
- And how do you feel it?
Husband:
- If the matter has recently been a lover, then you will not receive
pleasure.
Wife:
- Oh - Oh - Oh - Ah - Ah - Ah - Oh - Oh
Joke #41153 —  
 
0
 
What normal person is different from a saboteur?
The average person goes into the bushes to take a shit, and saboteur nasret - and in
bushes ...
Joke #41152 —  
 
0
 
Programmer to quarrel with his wife. Tu all sick of it in his heart:
- Enough! Shut pancake, a victim of abortion!
- Do you .. You assume a look, a victim of photoshop!
Joke #41151 —  
 
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In the Russian version of the new OS from Microsoft will come in versions windose Vista,
half-Vista, Paz and windose miser. Latter with the ability to upgrade to
full version of Steam.
Joke #41150 —  
 
0
 
God first created man, that he had anything to say ..
Joke #40935 —  
 
0
 
Uncertain dignity in it compensated for the undisputed
disabilities.
Firstonx
Joke #40934 —  
 
0
 
Giraffe says:
- And in good weather, I see their hooves ...
Joke #40933 —  
 
0
 
Recently on the radio "Chanson" became more performers in the style
Fraer rock ...
Joke #40932 —  
 
0
 
Waiter:
- And this is our firm and very popular salad.
- The taste of something not very.
- Its main virtue in another person he does not soil.
Joke #40931 —  
 
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Young caterpillar, happily twisting, crawling toward the older, the sly
pupate sister.
- Do not be sad, old woman! And you'll make the same holiday!
-?
- Prikin! Received "on demand" complimentary. Feast on
all day tomorrow: the birthday and engagement and wedding, and again
Birthday, anniversary ... just do not even remember! And the signature intriguing:
"A butterfly on the bottom Dnevka. However, pohmelyatsya not call ...
Joke #40930 —  
 
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Women are not the answer for those who filed.
Joke #40929 —  
 
0
 
Newly created wife, called his mother:
- Mom, I do not like your firm porridge, repeat-ka recipe.
- You take grits, boiled ...
- Ah Boil ...
Joke #40928 —  
 
0
 
- P. What did you do it on a tractor ride?
- In the solarium.
- Why?
- For diesel fuel.
Joke #40927 —  
 
0
 
Estonia lost to football in Russia, because the best players of the team
late in the match.
Joke #40926 —  
 
0
 
If you live on the outskirts, in a small town in an apartment on the ground
floor, do not despair. Remember that someday your city will
large margin become a center and an apartment for a fortune
buy for the store.
Alex
Joke #40925 —  
 
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