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According to some Russian media today in the district of Grozny on
roadside, which travelers columns of federal forces, found
and neutralized nuclear suitcase on the banner, stuffed with nails and
metal scraps to strengthen the harmful effect ...
Joke #11578 —  
 
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The armed conflict between Latvia and Lithuania.
Commander of Latvia calls Estonian:
- I know, you have two tanks! Could you lend them to us for the war

with Lithuania?
- We can give only one!
- And thanks for that! By the way, but why only one?
- Just a second, we have already borrowed Lithuanians!
Joke #11577 —  
 
0
 
- The book "Hand to Hand." This book will help you answer many
issues, in particular: "Hey, kid, you're in a district?", "a smoke
is not there? "And the most popular question -" Che? "
http://www.uaportal.com/Anekdot/
Joke #11576 —  
 
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It encroached on her honor their dignity ...
Joke #11575 —  
 
0
 
There is a peasant in a garbage can, sees a woman lying.
Guy: "Count to three."
Woman: "1,2,3"
The man: "And now back."
Woman: "3,2,1"
The man scratches his head: "It is strange, very good woman who threw something.
Joke #11574 —  
 
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- Waiting in vain, this bus runs only on holidays, - says
old boy at bus stop
- And my birthday today.
Joke #11573 —  
 
0
 
It is interesting to observe the attendant got the tomatoes from 3-liter
Banks ...
Joke #11572 —  
 
0
 
They talk to two. One brags:
- I'm a member of 25 centimeters!
- And I have as much 0.25 meters!
- Hey, this is the same!
- But as it sounds!
Joke #11571 —  
 
0
 
- What is your drummer in a strange knocking on the drum?
- Since he was a former radio operator!
Joke #11570 —  
 
0
 
The company employed a secretary receives 3 girls.
They asked the same question:
- You are a virgin?
First says:
- Yes!
- Free!
Second, on reflection:
- No!
- Free!
Third:
- Here is where you take a job, then yourself and check!
- OK!
Joke #11569 —  
 
0
 
After a long search, orientation to the West or the East,
Ukraine chose homosexuality.
Joke #11568 —  
 
0
 
Sad anecdote.
Spring. Depression. They talk to two actors:
- I would like to play Ilya Ilyich Oblomov.
- Why?
- How to "why"? All the first action you can play without getting up from the couch ...
- Clearly ... I would like to play Gerasimos ...
- And this is why?
- To teach the words do not ...
Joke #11567 —  
 
0
 
What audience are the leading U.S. newspapers:

Wall Street Journal read the people who run the country.
Washington Post read people who think that they control
country.
New York Times read people who think that they should manage
country.
USA Today read people who think that running the country - they
duty, but who do not understand what they are writing in the Washington Post.
Los Angeles Times read people who believe that they can not
govern the country because for that they have no free
time as located in the city's largest film studio.
Boston Globe read people whose parents ran the country and did
is much better than those who do it now.
New York Daily News read people who have no idea
who governs the country.
Miami Herald read by people who want to control another country.
Joke #11566 —  
 
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The border guards, remember that 25% of the captured perpetrators belong to you.
The rest you must pass the State.
B. Hudimov
Joke #11565 —  
 
0
 
As an avid drinker produplyaetsya, what's the date?
He takes a bottle of beer, looks at the date of manufacture and to taste
determines how much his days.
Joke #11564 —  
 
0
 
Announcement: Palais des Sports concert of Philip Kirkorov. Breathtaking show
live sound!
Joke #11563 —  
 
0
 
All evening, he forced me to drink, saying that it excites him. A
morning I found him in bed with Svetka. I suppose she could not,
that it is not for myself excited ...
Joke #11562 —  
 
0
 
Women often say that men think that they have between their legs.
Then it is understandable why women do not think at all.
Joke #11561 —  
 
0
 
I wanted to go to the concert hall named after Tchaikovsky, and he dragged me into
bed. And rightly so - there is no Schubert, and not lay next to.
Joke #11560 —  
 
0
 
Threw the old man in the sea dragnet for the first time ... Then in the second ...
then in the third ... and then came home and threw on the dick to sea
old woman.
Joke #11559 —  
 
0
 
He had always treated me as a thing. Continuing visiting
forgot ...
Joke #11558 —  
 
0
 
There are two friends:
- They say you married a girl, which could not even dream of.
- Right said ... Do you think that I could dream of such
bitch?
Joke #11557 —  
 
0
 
Ministry of Foreign Affairs of Russia sent an appeal to
Mr. Secretary of State Colin Powell: "Using
force can only be a last resort. We solemnly call
United States of America to do their utmost to prevail peace
path taken by the Security Council and which supports
the vast majority of the international community. "
Mr. Secretary of State sent a reply message to
Ministry of Foreign Affairs of Russia: "And you would not go on
x $ d ".
Joke #11556 —  
 
0
 
Politicians! What have you done! Odessa-mama and papa were Rostov -
in different states ...
A. Gotovsky
Joke #11555 —  
 
0
 
Girls who are broken, fragile not call ...
A. Gotovsky
Joke #11554 —  
 
0
 
Met two. Cry.
- Well, now let the good! Who there yesterday, the Mercedes drove away?
Joke #11553 —  
 
0
 
Kashchei Immortal released in 30-degree frost ...
and .. frostbitten left his immortality.
Joke #11552 —  
 
0
 
Russo-Estonian border. For vehicles entering into Estonia
suitable Estonian border guard.
- Cha-a-aList.Add ?.... Netti, ne chaayy ... Kofffeee? ... Netti, ne kofffeee ...
Kakaava ... Kakaava? About! GOAL KAKAVAA VASHSHEGO VIZITTA?
Frantz
Joke #11551 —  
 
0
 
Dzerzhinsky Lenin:
- Well, how's the new young assistant, Vladimir Ilyich?
- Poyabyvams ... , Cough, cough - cough Lenin.
- Oh Yes, you igrets, my friend!
- I govoyu, singing WOULD YOU sudag, pekyatit these gyaznye hints!
Joke #11550 —  
 
0
 
In the courtroom too noisy. Judge stated:
- If you do not silence, I will have to remove all of the hall.
Make out the fourth case and not hear a word!
Joke #11549 —  
 
0
 
Hooligan with a knife chasing four men.
- Do not you ashamed? - A counter-old woman exclaims. - He is one
but you four!
- That's the way it is so, but we do not know which one of us, he pursues!
Joke #11548 —  
 
0
 
Thank you for choosing our search engine for adults
"Hard".
There is processing your request, "sex child rape porn babies with
virgins. It only takes a few seconds. On the search results to
You will leave the operative group.
Joke #11330 —  
 
0
 
Cupid practicing, shooting at cans, and watched with interest,
they then climbed on each other ...
(c) Deuterium, http://www.people.nnov.ru/maslov/poetry
Joke #11329 —  
 
0
 
Recording on an answering machine:
"Hello. Talk to you answering machine. If you have a bad
news, talk right now, if good, then wait for the sound
signal.
Joke #11328 —  
 
0
 
Visitor:
- Bartender! I'm in a glass of something floats!
Barman:
- That's when it begins to sink, call the rescue!
A. Kolomeysky
Joke #11327 —  
 
0
 
World Cup downhill ski mountains.
Pret a world champion. At breakneck speed, zip! zip! bypasses all the gates
clearly goes to the first place. Suddenly his right at full speed passes
family of new Russian - front papa, mama back, the last two rod
children, all on skis. Bypassed and the furious rate fled in the direction
finish.
Champion in full neponyatkah finishes. Downstairs in the crowd catches chapter
surpassed his family.
- How? How did you get??
- Yes normalek, bratelo, training, and fro ...
- Do not you scared to drive at that speed?
- Yes, no, not scary. Only the children a bit scary - they're not plump ...
Iggg
Joke #11326 —  
 
0
 
Mayonnaise "Mysterious"
expiry date indicated on the bottom of the banks
Joke #11325 —  
 
0
 
Barman:
- Where a visitor who wanted to get drunk as a lord?
- What?
- During his shoe sent!
A. Kolomeysky
Joke #11324 —  
 
0
 
Political TV commercials prove one thing: some candidates
can tell you about all its merits and qualifications of all
30 seconds.
Joke #11323 —  
 
0
 
Barman:
- You see this visitor? He obviously had one too!
Visitor:
- Pour me a glass too much!
A. Kolomeysky
Joke #11322 —  
 
0
 
Baby monkey grows only in the monkey, pig - a pig,
foal - a donkey, goat - a goat ... The human infant can
grow in any of the above!
Joke #11321 —  
 
0
 
and even during the war this was the case: was walking through the woods a little
Soviet boy, and he was approached by a German spy, disguised as another
Soviet boy, and began to talk to him. as long as they
talked, shouted from the window of a Soviet woman and a little boy
said: "My name is eat, and he was the other boy said:" well my name
Ivan. and then the little boy Soviet vebal another boy in
penny, and then kick in the nuts. so little Soviet boy
exposed German spy.
klaus
Joke #11320 —  
 
0
 
Ministry of Health warns:
Careless gerontofiliya can lead to necrophilia!
Joke #11319 —  
 
0
 
- You bastard, monster, nasty sleazebag! You ruined my whole
life! Mess up all the brightest feelings, narcissistic, despicable
selfish! Nothing! I look at you I can not! Kiss me!
Joke #11318 —  
 
0
 
The shop floor women's underwear. Seller drawn to the woman:
- Excuse me, you what size cup?
Male, ahead of his wife:
- Well you know what a cup! We have a saucer!
Joke #11317 —  
 
0
 
The bar phone rang. Visitor:
- This is me!
Barman:
- How do you know?
- Only my wife can be so disgusting to call!
A. Kolomeysky
Joke #11316 —  
 
0
 
Anya and Olya long dreamed to go to the Tretyakov Gallery, and go!
Joke #11315 —  
 
0
 
Visitor:
- I used to bring with him a pig, to see who can become a
if you do not stop drinking.
- And now?
- Now bring roach, to see who can become, if you throw
drink!
A. Kolomeysky
Joke #11314 —  
 
0
 
Soup "Akin" - I see - the boil!
Joke #11313 —  
 
0
 
I bought an electronic artificial vagina.
You can not imagine that a failure, the processor may be so pleasant ...
Joke #11312 —  
 
0
 
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