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New best jokes, funniest anecdotes

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Business coaching on the topic: "Features of motivation apes in
economic crisis. "
Joke #50473 —  
 
0
 
Gazprom head Alexei Miller told the reporters his
impressions from the talks with the head of Naftogaz Dubyna. "Most
I fear that the Ukrainians did not stole something from me directly at
negotiations. Fortunately, the presence of international observers kept
Ukrainian side of the reckless behavior "- was pleased
said Russia's top manager.
Joke #50472 —  
 
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In Armenian Radio asked:
- As for the Japanese known as San Francisco?
Armenian Radio answers:
- San Francisco.
Joke #50471 —  
 
0
 
- Dad, what is an optimistic ending?
- This is when everything goes under the dog's tail, but before the ass-clinging
the little hair ...
- I. ..
- And in this story ends.
Joke #50470 —  
 
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Little Johnny and vertical sex!
- What is the vertical sex? - Little Johnny asked the pope.
- This is when a firm course introduced in rasschirenny corridor.
- A myagkmy sex?
- This is when people cover the corridor mat to make it softer to fall
with a wooden!
Joke #50469 —  
 
0
 
In connection with the matured global financial crisis, the Western
top managers waive fees and bonuses, Japanese
top managers commit hara-kiri. Russia's top managers, while at
intersection of East and West, have chosen their way: they refused
harakiri.
Joke #50468 —  
 
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The guy at the liquor store:
- What would you take a good drink?
- Here are Cognac - three years of exposure, here are five years old!
- Come on three, five, I can not stand it!
Joke #50467 —  
 
0
 
Military unit. Late at night on the street came the lieutenant colonel
and general.
A: "Comrade Colonel, Comrade General, check out the stars in the sky.
P: That would be on their epaulettes.
D: That would be on their brandy.
Joke #50466 —  
 
0
 
Chinese Greek philosophers more ... they hit harder.
Joke #50464 —  
 
0
 
It's silly to say the naked truth naked woman.
Joke #50463 —  
 
0
 
What is the work "day after two?
This is when talking about his wife that he had gone for a day, and come back after two.
Joke #50462 —  
 
0
 
Group Lesopoval released a new album. We hope, soon be released and
group Lesopoval.
Joke #50461 —  
 
0
 
At the disco strings sophomore rode so that ruined her
hairdo.
Joke #50460 —  
 
0
 
Real football fans for our team are ready to break even
favorite team.
Joke #50459 —  
 
0
 
Varieties of broilers:
Principal: scored in their prime.
First: He was killed, so as not suffered.
Second: Do not have time ...
Joke #50458 —  
 
0
 
In connection with the launching of the aircraft carrier "George Bush" the Arab countries
announced a contest for anti-ship missile called
"Boot".
Joke #50457 —  
 
0
 
Premium equipment Lada Prior! You choose what you will
work! If you have something out of this working, you will break it in
warranty! (C)
Joke #50456 —  
 
0
 
Adam and Eve were the ancient ukrami. This is - exactly. Others would not have
ponadkusyvat that same apple from a snake ...
Joke #50454 —  
 
0
 
In Kiev on a visit a delegation of Somali pirates for the exchange
experience.
Joke #50453 —  
 
0
 
Representatives of Gazprom's claim that the Ukrainians steal gas.
At the same time say: "... our Ukrainian colleagues ...".
Joke #50452 —  
 
0
 
Yushchenko calls for Bush:
S: Bush, let denyushek with Russia over gas pay. And then we have
freeze, freezing Europe, production stops!
B: Yes, you leave me alone! My cat died!
Joke #50451 —  
 
0
 
Putin said that even during the Soviet era gas was continuously
Europe.
- So can you again in the Union? - Hinted Europeans.
- Najera! - Russian replied, - better money.
Joke #50450 —  
 
0
 
When, finally, begins operation to force Ukraine to transit?
Joke #50449 —  
 
0
 
Rare gas gets to the middle of Ukraine ...
Joke #50448 —  
 
0
 
Moscow lifted Days of Kazakh culture, which found that for
culture had in mind.
Joke #50447 —  
 
0
 
Philosophical Dialogue:
- All the old - is surviving in the mind of the new.
- No. Old - it's just surviving new. A surviving in the mind of the new - it
obsolete.
Joke #50446 —  
 
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My wife bought a packet of condoms and jealous of each.
Joke #50445 —  
 
0
 
What is the age for a woman?
When wearing shoes, dress and clip it looks better than just wearing shoes
and clips.
Joke #50444 —  
 
0
 
Did you know that the Christmas tree, hosted by the children of employees
Gazprom is not Santa Claus only gives presents to kiddies, but once
collects kickbacks?
Joke #50443 —  
 
0
 
One of the longest and most complicated show was filmed in the Soviet Union and was called
"The Congress of the CPSU."
Joke #50442 —  
 
0
 
Our director said that in connection with the crisis of salaries for January will be
give products - ie, sites and banners ...
Joke #50441 —  
 
0
 
If you have a mobile phone has extra 50 rubles, send an SMS to
number of his military unit.
Joke #50440 —  
 
0
 
In some of the Wedding Palace recently introduced for a fee
additional service - before the final answer read the groom:
"You have the right to remain silent, everything said you can
used against you ...".
Joke #50439 —  
 
0
 
Blonde girlfriend complains:
- Dog in my fool! I show her the sausage and ask: "Who in the house
Boss? ", and she growls at me and sausage takes.
Joke #50438 —  
 
0
 
How do cunnilingus great and powerful language?
And how can be a great and powerful language, which has no equivalent to this
word?
Joke #50437 —  
 
0
 
Become a sperm donor for a young pretty girl.
Only direct transfusion!
Joke #50436 —  
 
0
 
Issue of the Armenian radio:
- What are the similarities between Dr. Freud and Lieutenant Rzhevsky?
- The doctor was a theorist of the sexual revolution, and Rzhevskij - its
practice!
Joke #50435 —  
 
0
 
They tried to undermine the reputation of Ukraine, but was not found.
Joke #50434 —  
 
0
 
To prove the facts of the EU Ukraine of stealing gas, Gazprom put into
pipeline pilot lot of nerve gas sarin. Result
surpassed all expectations: theft is no more! Ukraine and the EU too.
Joke #50433 —  
 
0
 
Did you know that ...

In Gazprom has several meeting rooms with different height ceilings.

This explains the variation in prices for gas from 250 to 418.
Joke #50432 —  
 
0
 
There are two neighbors after the New Year, one says to another:
- Yesterday went to take a shower - hot water barely flowing ...
- Yes, like Ukraine is stealing not only the gas!
Joke #50431 —  
 
0
 
In Russian schools, have introduced a new system of ratings. Now you only
two estimates: FSUs. and tries. Poh. - Commendable tries. - Cheeky. And what
think?
Parsley
Joke #50430 —  
 
0
 
Incidents
Yesterday in the center of Moscow driver SUV Ford Expedition "is not
lost control and at a speed of 60 km / h vehal in standing on
sidewalk N. Valuev. Fortunately, the car worked pillows
Security and passengers escaped with bruises and abrasions. Less fortunate
SUV: it is not podlezhigt recovery. N. Valuev refused
Medical treatment of scratches on his leg and saying "They have only themselves to blame"
left the accident scene.
Joke #50429 —  
 
0
 
Old Muscovite, dying, calls to his son:
- Son, today I will die. Execute my last request: find out what
tomorrow will be the weather?
Joke #50427 —  
 
0
 
The sign on the fence: "Beware of the dog ate Viagra!".
Joke #50426 —  
 
0
 
What is the age for men?
When a woman in shoes, clothes, and the clip-like more than just a
shoes and clips.
Joke #50425 —  
 
0
 
Crisis ERROR ON FIRE.
- So. Report to Major fire service, why yesterday burnt to ashes
separate building, and your subordinates, rather than extinguish
building, doused each other?
- Yes, they mistakenly connected a fire hose to the beer tank ...
Joke #50424 —  
 
0
 
- Son, thou sweet "squirrel"?
- No, I will not! I have all the time the tail gets stuck in my throat!
Joke #50423 —  
 
0
 
- My friend is afraid of nothing, only the woman in white!
- Death?
- No, the dentist!
Joke #50422 —  
 
0
 
Crisis treatment.
- How's life?
- Yes, what kind of life, when the country's crisis.
Not so fun - with grief vodka drink ..
Joke #50421 —  
 
0
 
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