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With "Legs bred." (Vasil Lucas)
Joke #16376 —  
 
0
 
Told me this morning ankdot: "Pugacheva and Kirkorov again serve
together, collecting the stadiums. However, on-demand audience, do not sing, but only
talk about their divorce.
- And I thought: "Osspodi, well something like: Do not sing! Also, of course - not
care, do not listen, but one thing is the knowledge that - "can not sing" - has already heats
soul.
Joke #16375 —  
 
0
 
Telegram Government

In Pr RF

In vain, oh vain, guys you have sold U.S. Alaksu!

Martyr's Brigade.
Joke #16374 —  
 
0
 
Kasyanov, how you managed to earn 100 million dollars for 2 months
his premiership?
- I will reveal as the course ..
- And vsetaki answer the question
- I will reveal as the course ..
- You got stuck?
- I will reveal as the course ..
Joke #16373 —  
 
0
 
Began winter aggravation: the air again, the old New Year's song
PRINCIPAL of the new.
Joke #16372 —  
 
0
 
Announcement in the London newspaper:
"In connection with the release of a new book by J. Rolling" Harry Potter and the
Half-Blood Prince, the administration of King's Cross station announces tender for
supply foam for lining kollon on platform number 9. Wanted
nurses to provide first aid to people who tried to pass on
platform number 9 34. And also a group of psychiatrists who can explain
victim, that Harry Potter does not exist. "
Joke #16371 —  
 
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No matter how much say Chelsea, Abramovich will not begin!
Joke #16370 —  
 
0
 
- Chukchi, stove, lit the stove?
- Flooded! In the hole, however, barely climbed!
Joke #16369 —  
 
0
 
In response to the anti-Russia position of the Government of Ukraine, Russia
suggested a blowjob ... gas at world prices.
Joke #16368 —  
 
0
 
Sociological study on women's issues:

5% of all women find that they ass in perfect order.
The remaining 95% percent believe that it is they are either too thin (10%),
or too thick (85%) and sadness that were married to such a asshole.
Joke #16367 —  
 
0
 
Announcement on the same site on the Internet:

Estonian Porn
This is a rarity, a pancake. Such things do not find it. Foreshadowing questions immediately
replied: "Until the end of the film, they still had time to undress."
Joke #16366 —  
 
0
 
- Dear passengers! Motor ship "Ukrainian Revolution" does not go farther,
please release the cabin and not to forget their orange vests.
Joke #16364 —  
 
0
 
Interesting body - the "Public Chamber. One-third of its appointed by the Supreme
power, the remaining two thirds of the gains she ... and then from her
required to file the voice of democracy!
Joke #16363 —  
 
0
 
They sit in canteen House of Scientists, two peasants. One asks the other:
- What comes first in the vodka - water or alcohol?
- Kaif!
- Well, you're a philosopher!
- No. Naturalist.
Joke #16362 —  
 
0
 
Nothing excites like Peeping for the woman in the key -
well, when she throws down her shoes, takes off his clothes,
withdraws from the hair peg and inserting it into the hole.
Joke #16361 —  
 
0
 
Negro came to find work in the beauty salon. Asked what can
do, replied:
- Maschina padzhigat.
Joke #16360 —  
 
0
 
Women love the ears - the men, ringing mudyami!
Joke #16359 —  
 
0
 
Any worthwhile thing left unattended, in Russia is traditionally a
pi $ outpace or break.
Joke #16358 —  
 
0
 
Award wage sometimes within the meaning of something like Vaseline.
Joke #16357 —  
 
0
 
It was his father's 3 sons: Ivan the fool, Petro-moron and Fedor-freak
Joke #16356 —  
 
0
 
Announcement on the forum:
"Dear customers, if anyone of you sees this forum
list of forums, sew your UserName in the subject and Administrator will
you appropriate access rights. "
Joke #16355 —  
 
0
 
- Interesting .. Who will be the winner in the 2008 election?
- And who will get more of dioxin - and that will be!
Joke #16354 —  
 
0
 
The men more capable than women. Even in ancient times, when
arithmetic was on the fingers, they could show more digits.
Joke #16353 —  
 
0
 
The programmer runs into the police:
- I lost the car!
- Again you are! Yes, he has not gone anywhere, is where we left. Remember
404 - this is his ESP.
Joke #16352 —  
 
0
 
- How to be called the final part of the epic Harry Potter?
- Harry Potter and the Holy Inquisition.
Joke #16351 —  
 
0
 
- Dad, I need your help?
- Come on, let me guess. He promised you eternal love, then ottrahal as
whore and threw?
- Hmm ... Actually, no. I'm only in the 3 rd grade math help
do.
Joke #16350 —  
 
0
 
Husband comes home at night after a night at home spent the night.
Wife: - Well, where have you been?
Husband: - You see, my dear, I settled down to yet another work night shifts.
Wife: - And whom do you work?
Husband: - terrorist.
Wife: - This is like?
Husband: - I am trying to organize the country's population explosion.
Joke #16349 —  
 
0
 
Russia inversion formula inventory:
ch # zdil-proeb @ l-ch # zdil
Joke #16348 —  
 
0
 
- What is the best beer?
- That which accidentally left in the morning.
Joke #16347 —  
 
0
 
In fact, Pope Carlo was a staunch supporter of Darwin's theory.
So first he vystrogal logs from a monkey, and only then out of it
made Pinocchio.
Joke #16346 —  
 
0
 
Pope Carlo hewed Pinocchio.

Gray Cervix sadly dropped back into the icy water ...

The bears saw the crumpled bed teddy bear, and understand: there was
Masha.

In India, starting from childhood, female gender goes with the points on the forehead.

All around was quiet, as if all extinct ... What a beauty!

In the room ticking loudly sundial.

The poem is written in rhyme, that often occurs in the poet.

Population density of Australia is 4 persons per square
meter.

Early successes Pierre Bezukhov in love was bad - he just got married.

The body of a mammal consists of a head, torso, and four pairs of legs.

The Soviet people have not only put things on earth, but climbed up and into space.

She did not hear from him a single kind word, except the word fool.

Kashchei Immortal kept his death in one of two eggs, knocking confused
Ivanushka.

Woodpecker sat down and began to gnaw tree.

Othello rassviripelo and strangled Desdemona.

Peter Zalomov carried the red flag, about which all the time remembering his mother.

Rembrandt stood in the rain pants in the family and smiled blissfully ...

Peasant was wealthy: he had a pig and his wife.

Cow - a large animal with four legs on the corners.

Because of the clouds looked a ray of sun and struck the kukushonka.

And the dog went, gratefully wagging its tail. Not many people could
well done!

Long, cold winter evenings, she was knitting a long, cold winter
sweaters.

Colonel danced with his daughter beaker.

We in the woods in winter there is not a songbird, but crows.

In the open window broke into the draft, smart as a broom
Joke #16345 —  
 
0
 
He studied geography. The boundary between Asia and Europe passes through the Great
Caucasus Mountains. Question: Caucasian states - is geographically
Turkey, Armenia, Georgia, Azerbaijan, Iran. Why do some of them
sit in the Council of Europe, not in the Council of Asia and wants more?
Joke #16344 —  
 
0
 
Law students: Vladimir Wolf-ovich - and you really Tambov?
Joke #16343 —  
 
0
 
In the development of the theme:
- The main symptom of bird flu - an uncontrollable desire to give a shit
someone's hat.
- Then he told us not afraid! These chronically ill half the population - and
anything live ...
Joke #16342 —  
 
0
 
Goldfish - this is fiction, it does not exist is a complete fabrication.
So the question - where to catch her, it makes no sense. Scientist answered at
Bush's request.
Joke #16341 —  
 
0
 
Yesterday, Ivan Ivanovich Ivanov left home and never returned.
Question: how the homeless in general was in this apartment?
Joke #16340 —  
 
0
 
- Our people in the subway does not go by taxi.
Joke #16339 —  
 
0
 
Husband comes home tired, right in the bedroom to fuck his wife. Conducts
most are not overlooked, sex, and, satisfied, comes into the kitchen to eat.
There wife. Astonished, he asked, "If you're here, whom I have
fucking in the bedroom? "
My wife was speechless, finally said "Mom, why are you silent?"
Voice of the bedroom "I am with him for 15 years do not talk. But after this I
every night, according to the name under him moan. If I could right now to give birth,
then gave birth to 100 children "
"Well, you give, my mother" said her husband and ran back into the bedroom.
... The next day, the husband divorced his wife and married the former mother-.
Joke #16338 —  
 
0
 
Goes the new Russian 500 th Mercedes ...
Joke #16337 —  
 
0
 
Looked a son of the new Russian cinema mutfilm "Madagascar."
He wanted his own on the tape.
Comes home and tells his father "Buy" Madagascar. "To-morrow was."
Father, "No problem."
The next morning the boy wakes up, looks shelf with cassettes, but there is not.
He asked "Where is Madagascar?"
Father Like where? "In the ocean, of course."
Joke #16336 —  
 
0
 
America-Great Country!
Where did you get?
Nuuuuu ... they say!
Joke #16335 —  
 
0
 
Quote from the pre-election advertising candidate EDRA:
"... Moscow. Luzhkov. Gerasimov. The fate of Moscow's in our hands"
Joke #16334 —  
 
0
 
Once Rinat Akhmetov and Viktor Yanukovych were talking
live on TRK Ukraine.

- Viktor - said Rinat Akhmetov - how do you in
struck by the idea to invite me to run for Parliament from
Party
Regions?

- Who - me? - Viktor misunderstood.

- Well, not me the same - with a smile parried Rinat Akhmetov
Joke #16333 —  
 
0
 
Announcement: Gimenoplastika.
Contact: Novodevichy Convent.
Joke #16332 —  
 
0
 

Continuation of old ....

Immediately after the declaration of American Scientists on the expulsion of the expedition to Mars in
2015, Russian promised that they would be on Mars before, and almost
two times cheaper.

- What is the secret Russian scientists?
- There is no secret. Ordinary Americans are planning to return there.
- And our impatiently Americans and return with them!

Joke #16241 —  
 
0
 
Road. Goes jeep under two hundred. It slows down traffic cop.
- Violated?
- Yes, but urgently needs to be ...
- Fines, or the right to withdraw?
- Well, come on, like so ...
- In short, I have a wheelbarrow petered out - to drag the post, and I'm fine
with you for the abuse did not take it. Okay?
- Okay.
Lada catchy, go, opens the door jeep:
- Hey, hold on tight behind the wheel, going as agreed!
Joke #16122 —  
 
0
 
When a girl wants sex, and love all there, she decides that
sex her enough to feel confidence in the partner. If a girl is good and
clever, then over time it becomes more and trusting ...
Joke #16121 —  
 
0
 
Gathered once Giner, Filatov and Chervichenko and let's find out who
fans love stronger. Giner said: "I am for two seasons a lot of things
made: the rich sponsors have found the best players bought, bought judges,
"Spartacus" three times defeated, his team in the champions led, coach
bad to good shift. I am very fond of CSKA fans! ". Filatov
- "Well, on my team look! Champions steel, the stadium was built,
Real Inter defeated, all of our coaches are respected in Europe, the League
Champions favor. But for me, the fans "Locomotive" in the fire and
water! ". Chervichenko:" Hey, guys, you can not see real people's love!
Most of all love me. Here I am for two seasons - "Spartacus" at the tenth
lowered position, the best coach he drove, his pupils
drove, scored the team is the cheapest shit with banana plantations and
Brazilian beaches, in the Champions League lost 1:18, horses 3 times
lost, the stadium is not built, ill-spartachey called "cattle", the price of
tickets raised. But How I love the fans CSKA, Lokomotiv "
"Zenith" and "Dinamo" - you are not dreaming! ".
Joke #16120 —  
 
0
 
Do not mistake that does not work. (c) Windows
Joke #16119 —  
 
0
 
- Here you are - the employee restaurant, a waiter. But worms do you have?
- How many servings?
Joke #16118 —  
 
0
 
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