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Student sits at home, teaches the poem aloud: "snowstorm covers the sky lies ...
storm mist sky lies ... storm mist ... storm mist ... storm ... storm ...
storm ... "His mother's voice from the kitchen:" Little Johnny! Take your hand from his pants! ".
Joke #17832 —  
 
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There comes a man to dance and to the bar: "Please, one hundred grams and a cucumber!".
Vodka drinks, cucumber puts in his pocket. The waitress in bewilderment: "Why not
ate? ". Man:" His strategy. I put cucumber in the right pocket,
invite a lady to dance and immediately pressed into the right side ... She thinks
it%%%, throws left, and here we were waiting for her and !!!".
Joke #17831 —  
 
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What is resuscitation? It rises from the tomb when the MOE. (GROB --
Civil Defense of the USSR).
Joke #17830 —  
 
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From the south - avian virus, from the north - komputorny ... Thank you, Grandfather Frost,
arrived in Moscow for Hanukkah!
Joke #17829 —  
 
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Atlanta held the sky. Mafia - everything else.
Joke #17828 —  
 
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Fantastic. "The Master and Margarita" - naked women with no cellulite.
Joke #17827 —  
 
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In the new film W. Bortko the novel by Mikhail Bulgakov role of Sasha White again performed Esenin. Signed: Dr. Otto von laryngologist
Joke #17604 —  
 
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Yushchenko has sent commandos to blow up 31 December Russia's gas Station ,24-00 no explosion, the morning, no explosion, two hours, no explosion. decided to call the CIA to find out why the operation failed - You see, Mr. President of Ukraine, we could not think that Your soldiers sabotage the job there instead of fueling the gas business lighters.
Joke #17603 —  
 
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Flamingo asks starling: - You will fly again in the spring to the north? - Yes. - And the hunt for you to fly to Russia! It is cold and damp. - But there is so many parasites! Foods lacking all.
Joke #17600 —  
 
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A paid advertisement.

Imagine that you are in the hands unexpectedly phone. With it you take pictures, surf the Internet, connect to your computer transmit photos directly to the printer, looking at your presentation screen projector ...

And suddenly you're calling. You shoot up and there ... silence ... Because, as the phone is a super device works hard time. (Well, not fit there phone.)
Joke #17599 —  
 
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Advertisement: - Misha'al! Misha'al! HAPPY NEW YEAR! - What are you yelling about stupid? Now wake the whole house, someone militia cause. - And I'm not sorry! MIA presents: the new tariff "New Year". Orite night on the street all 2 cents per minute!
Joke #17598 —  
 
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Why in the program "Sex with MAIL SAVE" did not show sex with Anfisa Chekhov??
Joke #17597 —  
 
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Year handsome red (or red-yellow) Rooster ends. Ukraine! Idea!
Joke #17596 —  
 
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Nazis when smothered in the gas chambers of the Slavs - it meant term - "choked" Slavs are now strangling the term "obezgazili.
Joke #17595 —  
 
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To the deputies in the State Duma voted correctly on the remote to Gryzlov derived controls supply of electricity and heating each house MP
Joke #17594 —  
 
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Russian Orthodox Church said that if the Ukrainian Catholic not return to her temples on the territory of Ukraine, they will disconnect them gas and candles will be sold in tridoroga
Joke #17593 —  
 
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Vseukranskoe association Bandivschina "

BYT - Bandits of Yulia Tymoshenko

Block V. Tymoshenko, BYUVT - BlYuVoTa

Block Yanukovych - Shit

One hopes that the captain Vrungel was right when he said: "As You call it a boat, so it will float! "
Joke #17592 —  
 
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After classes in the evening, two friends go out into the street. To be get home, one of them money for the bus there, behaviors: 1) Russian and Russian One farewell, said: "Well all good, see you tomorrow, I'll go foot, there is no money for the bus, "the second replies:" No problem, I'll give you "

And both go home. " 2) Russian and German Russian: "Well all good, see you tomorrow, I'll go on foot, money bus no, German: "all good, uvidimya" and leaves. 3) Russian and a Jew Russian: Well all good, see you tomorrow, I'll go on foot, money bus no "Jew:" No problem, I'm with you for company a walk "
Joke #17591 —  
 
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Sorry. Anecdote 12 of 25.12.05 not published. In " - Vladimir Vladimirovich, you have read our proposals to Ukraine at prices gas? - Yes, it suits me. But I have two quick points: first -- smart-ass is written in small letters, and the ** th - separately " was continued:

- Oh, Vladimir Vladimirovich, I am not the one you gave the paper. This was their message.
Joke #17590 —  
 
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Advertisement: "For 10 years, as we return the hair .." ... And never will return ....
Joke #17589 —  
 
0
 
What are you, face ... Internet.
Joke #17588 —  
 
0
 
Salton with butter cream mink - mink: it is not only valuable fur and tasty butter.
Joke #17587 —  
 
0
 
In the sale received new coats of green skin ... Acquired before the new year and get a gift scalp member GriinPys.
Joke #17586 —  
 
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New achievement in the fight for the rights chilaveka: now munsulmankam allowed fotagrafirovatsya not only in head scarves, but also a suicide belt.
Joke #17585 —  
 
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I Golopopenko Arsenide Galievich formally studied the purse officially acknowledge that the price of red caviar, established neighbor fisherman, after being drunk, I spat in his face, is economic pressures and demand on the grounds that he had previously treated I was free to determine its validity as a racial, sexual and religious discrimination
Joke #17584 —  
 
0
 
- Alla, this apartment Kuznecovyh? - Hey, wah, abazhdy themselves just vashli ...
Joke #17582 —  
 
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- Honey, do not want to try my yogurt? (I mean, do blowjob) - No way, did you get it prokis ... - Well, bl @, who was to blame something!
Joke #17581 —  
 
0
 
- Hello! I - a talking washing machine, Indesit ... Would you like me in 1255-th time to tell you an anecdote about zablevanny tie?
Joke #17580 —  
 
0
 
~ ~ ~
Vasya and Saddam Hussein

Saddam Hussein is sitting on the bank of the Mississippi and fish catches. Approach it
young law-abiding American couple in love. The guy says:
- Sir, you can not fish!
Saddam turns. Those two will know it and with the Iraqi dictator
all legs escape. Saddam was sitting on and kicks catches. Suitable elderly
American couple.
- Sir, you can not fish!
Again the same picture. Two old run away from fear. Saddam was sitting on
and looks at the sun. Suitable for him Russian (a little with pokers)
Joke #17579 —  
 
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TV - it komivoyazho (e) p which is always at home.)
Joke #17578 —  
 
0
 
last year Ukraine had sold Georgia neezdyaschie tanks Ukraine sold Azerbaijan falling aircraft Poland, Ukraine had sold stolen gas from Russia By the way what a bar code from Ukraine!
Joke #17577 —  
 
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In connection with the sudden lack of urgency for sale party 50 million masks. Self from Ukraine.
Joke #17576 —  
 
0
 
If a girl says "Net" means that it is from the Caucasus.
Joke #17575 —  
 
0
 
Alarms are different: mechanical, electronic, quartz and urinary.
Joke #17574 —  
 
0
 
The more drunk, more beautiful world.
Joke #17573 —  
 
0
 
Nothing reduces the number of experiments, like falling on my head objects (Newton).
Joke #17572 —  
 
0
 
1966, Stanislav Govorukhin removes film "Vertical" from Vladimir Vysotsky in the title role. 2008, Stanislav Govorukhin shoots documentary "Vertical" from Vladimir Putin and Akhmad Kadyrov in the lead roles.
Joke #17571 —  
 
0
 
Attention, fake!

In the shops of the city received N Party defective wireless optical mice. They have, instead of the ball in the lower part is inserted, the red light. The wire is generally absent. But included is a plastic figovina with metal pimpochkoy neponyanogo appointment at the end. Tests conducted by specialists of our company, showed that these mice still be used. However, it is not clear how.

www.tata-minisoft.de.ms
Joke #17570 —  
 
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- Hello, the Kremlin? - Yes, the Kremlin. - A smoke is not there? - Tu-tu-tu ...

- Hello, the Kremlin? - Yes, the Kremlin! - Drink not there? - Tu-tu-tu ...

- Hello, the Kremlin? - Yes, the Kremlin! - Not to eat there? - Tu-tu-tu ...

- Hello, the Kremlin? - Yes! Kremlin! - Give at least circuses! - TV watch! - That I "see" a familiar voice ...
Joke #17569 —  
 
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Recently it became known that the American game company ID Software signed a contract with the Government of Ukraine on the use national idea in the game Quake 4. Now, according to the plot of the latter protagonist in the middle of the game turned in the Orange freaks and the new mask leads his people to victory, breaking and destroying everything in its path!
Joke #17568 —  
 
0
 
Yeshua, in conversation with Pontius Pilate screwed firm: "Greetings from Sasha White! "
Joke #17567 —  
 
0
 
New Year's address of President Yushchenko to the people: Dear Ukrainians! A year ago you came to the Maidan that would support me if damned Muscovites like to put in my place bandyuka Yanukovych. Now the damned Muscovites turned off our gas! I again ask you to support me and come to Maidan. Ukraine - not Russia, Ukraine - this is Europe! Europe and the U.S. support us in this difficult hour. Already after 2 days in Ukraine from fraternal Poland will arrive first echelons of peas! At Khreshatik already set last year's tent. Since a year ago, you will live in tents, eating peas, and fart in a tube! Do not let your zakonnoizbrannomu president to freeze!
Joke #17566 —  
 
0
 
why suddenly three companies selected special forces from Britain France and Germany suddenly arrived in Kiev? they handed out photos of staff Ukrainian natural gas companies and said shoot to kill when they try to January 1 twist gas valves.
Joke #17565 —  
 
0
 
From useful tips for women.

The more beer you drink in the evening, the less wrinkles you will have to morning.
Joke #17564 —  
 
0
 
That's because the paradox - naftgaz dispute with Gazprom, and will freeze the whole Ukrainian people.
Joke #17563 —  
 
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attending a briefing at the CIA: We have paid great leaders of the Orange Revolution money, what did they go? like what? - to study, they learned how to turn off the gas to its people.
Joke #17562 —  
 
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Clap eyelashes and took off. That's an order!
Joke #17561 —  
 
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Collected the father of sons, picked up the rod, bent - and the broken rod.

Then he took a pencil, began to bend it in every one - but not broken rods.

- So, the children, the morality of this. If anyone should bend - it is better to whole team. No one fails, no one quit.
Joke #17560 —  
 
0
 
Perhaps better: Bespltnye dentists in the teeth do not look?
Joke #17559 —  
 
0
 
George W. Bush, in order to prevent terrorist attacks suggested that all Arabs wear bandage on his hand with a crescent moon. And the Agency for National Security decided to build a ghetto.
Joke #17558 —  
 
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