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The real hero of the Order are not needed, it orders need real heroes.
Joke #18147 —  
 
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As reported by CNN, in Washington, the White House held a hunger strike protest, which was attended by several homeless people. According to Our correspondent, bums are going to continue to protest until long as they do not bring something to eat.
Joke #18146 —  
 
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There are two old Jew.
- You know, yesterday I met with the telegraph, we had gone in
restaurant, then I invited her to his home, and we all were, and
three. Do that, do not believe me?
- Why, I believe. I believe that you went to a restaurant, I believe that you have
home, I believe that was three-fold.
But the fact that she was a telegraph - do not believe.
- But why?
- Yes, because when you last stood still telegraph
invented!
Taken from the book: "Jewish anecdote
Joke #18145 —  
 
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If someone else's money assigned arbitrary units, means that their are
conditional zero.
Joke #18144 —  
 
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Government of Russia has promised to every player in our football team
50 thousand bucks for access to the final games of the World Cup.
And they have achieved stunning results - saved the country almost
1,5 million dollars!
Joke #18143 —  
 
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How to become an intelligent, fair, honest and decent judge?

There are four rules:

1. Smart judge accepts a bribe by a lawyer, and not directly from
defendant.

2. Just - appoints punishment strictly in accordance with
price list.

3. Honest - do not hide that takes.

4. Decency - divided (with colleagues, superiors, with the prosecutor, but
you never know ...)
Joke #18142 —  
 
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Not so much that does not spoil the mood, but in a very short time, as
not open the parachute.
Joke #18140 —  
 
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Lord, how I hate the fact that nerve cells are not restored! ..
Joke #18139 —  
 
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Enraptured, you know the measure to the indescribable delight accidentally
joined opisuemy!
Joke #18138 —  
 
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- I have heard from our president watch for 60 thousand dollars.
- He is their perhaps Berezovsky gave?
- No, he took them Hodori.
Joke #18137 —  
 
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- According to official statistics, Russia is not the most
silnopyuschaya country.
- These data indicate only that Russia's statistics - the most
silnopyuschie statistics in the world.
Mitka Golopupkin
Joke #18136 —  
 
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Choral phrase on the day a boy (when dancing around five
girls), sounding like: "Loaf, loaf, anyone care to choose" strongly
changes meaning depending on how many turns imeniniku --
10 or 20!
Joke #18135 —  
 
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Sale French car. Not broken, a new salon in the cabin a little
smell of burning.
Joke #18134 —  
 
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- Girl, give me a kiss!
- No! And in general, climbed with me to hell!
Joke #18133 —  
 
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I am standing on the pavement
In skiing barefoot
Whether the friction force exceeds my physical abilities,
Either the ratio of my mental development is slightly lower
average ...
Joke #18132 —  
 
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- Do you have a school that geography has been ?....
- Four ...
- If your dick send - can not get lost?
Joke #18131 —  
 
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Never eat the last mincemeat in a pan: one cutlet not
naeshsya, and an empty pan will wash.
Joke #18130 —  
 
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- Excuse me please - you Miss or Mrs.?
- Who the dick, miss! Not you see - a lady!
Joke #18129 —  
 
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- Grandpa, when you first kissed?
- In the army.
- C language?
- Remember, a jerk at the front do not have to choose!
(c) KVN
Joke #18128 —  
 
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Many will know - quickly confess.
Joke #18127 —  
 
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Customs confiscated goods, low prices! Shoes, clothing, drugs.
Joke #18126 —  
 
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Viktor Chernomyrdin immediately started writing the second volume of "Woe from
mind. "I have time ...
Joke #17917 —  
 
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Last toast - a toast, before falling into the salad.
Joke #17916 —  
 
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Pornoversiya "The Master and Margarita": "The wizard is in you, Margot
Joke #17915 —  
 
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Bulgakov's heir should sue Rowling, she stole
Woland (or at least translator)
Joke #17914 —  
 
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One Jew, and that Matthew the Evangelist.

Ha-Nostrils
Joke #17913 —  
 
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Directed is not right!
I so cruelly cats are not destroyed.

Head. Subdivision, Honorary kotoborets RF Sharikov.
PS Where to watch the World Wide Fund for Animal Welfare?
Joke #17912 —  
 
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Enemies priblatnennyh small nations and large sprats in oil in a brazen
nature utverzhdat that Lyme sepelyavit.
Offitsiyalno declare that no sprotam, kruppnym, middle and mellkim in
massle without massla individual zubey and chellyustey not inserted.

100 matolog with Yurrmally
Joke #17911 —  
 
0
 
Many times I closed my eyes, but that idiot from Peter prosecutor says
voice Ulyanov. I want to study not the gospel, and the April Theses.

Father Dudko
Joke #17910 —  
 
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The sensational discovery made geopolitologi:
Anal opening of the Earth is in Russia.
Now it became clear how much gas from Russia.
Joke #17909 —  
 
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Early morning January 2, 2006
Putin phone call awakens the sleeping Yushchenko.

- And in our apartment gas. And you?
- And we have gas
- What?
Joke #17908 —  
 
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New Year Eve night. House of the new Russian. Room size of a small
hangar, lined with amber panels. Persian rug Handmade
it covering the floor, the Iranian fat lazy cat plays with natural
diamond the size of an apple. In one corner, a servant in livery, feed from
platinum bowls strapping wolfhound, carefully removing from the grouse
bones and rasszhevyvaya for a dog especially hard pieces. In the center of the room
is chair, made from a throne of Louis XIV. It sits master
home, dressed in an ermine crimson jacket. Some chairs are:
brunette, which holds the cigars and lighted a cigarette lighter,
Brown, which holds a small keg of domestic beer,
blonde, who just undressed,
bald, which holds a volume of poems and stories Shura Karetnogo Fimy
Zhigantsa.
Beside a table made of ivory, on which it has a huge dish
made of Tyrannosaurus rex skull and filled with oysters, pate of
foie gras, caviar, skiyaki, slices of fugu, pickled
shark fins, wings fried ostrich eggs and snails. On
separate tray is a silver bowl of gruel and lies soldering
rye bread.
Sounds melody Taganka. New Russian climbs in an ermine coat and
took out a mobile, which the body is made of an alloy of zirconium,
tantalum, palladium, bismuth and meteoric iron. Includes her and hear.

- Kolya is Vova. I want to wish you, that in the coming new year
you have appeared some cherished desire.
Joke #17907 —  
 
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Just one letter could have prevented the "gas crisis":
If the name of the President of Russia was Puquina - he certainly hesitate
pressure on Ukraine gas. Europe would have laughed.
www.censor.net.ua
Joke #17906 —  
 
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January 2, 2006
Putin calls gospodunu Yushchenko:
- And in our apartment gas. And you?
- And we have a coup. There is.
Joke #17905 —  
 
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Putin (aside): Sche not vmerla Ukraina?
Joke #17904 —  
 
0
 
Projected filolgov, the word "crest" in Russia finally disappear from
use by February of the coming year. Scientists believe that it
replace the word "chaffinch".
Joke #17903 —  
 
0
 
They say that Ukrainians want the EU.
Well, welcome!
Your women have long been here.
Joke #17902 —  
 
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Putin - Pavlovsk:
- Once in the Ukraine in the Year of the Rooster, we could not get their
blue puppet, what plans you offer?
- The next year, I have to accept there is one female and male
thoroughbred ...
www.censor.net.ua
Joke #17901 —  
 
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Modern political thriller:
Afghanistan calls on Russia to buy straw at world prices.
Looming disrupt the flow of raw materials in the middle of winter (this is purely death
boys!).
In response, Russia asserts its right to take 15% of the drug,
by Afghan drives through its territory to Europe.
Netherlands state anxiety in this situation, but it is reasonable
declare their non-intervention (even if only tyavknut, pyrom on vodyaru
translated) in the internal dismantling of two independent states.
Joke #17900 —  
 
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When the chime will strike twelve, gently bite
his favorite for abalone ... Still ahead of a dog year.
Joke #17899 —  
 
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8 years in a row we will show the same entry address to the nation
Vladimir Putin, still January 1, no one will remember what he was there
said.
Joke #17898 —  
 
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Russian proverb: "They say that hens given.

Be Moisseeff
Joke #17897 —  
 
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Russian proverb: "The sin of the stick to shoot."

Check when viewing M & M. Each time shot, but missed.

Manual kozlodoeniya master Batir from Akmola
Joke #17896 —  
 
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Friendly staff oktyabryatskomu 1 st "B" class.
Your outgoing denunciation of the number of teacher E287KH MI considered.
Vovochka! If this fool publicly slandering that Gella Witch and
politically correct claims that train. her cold, pass this
pedofilke that she herself was.
Pace will be showing off, specifically namazhem sow.

Azazello
Joke #17894 —  
 
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The teacher asks Vovochka:
- Why such a bald? imitating whom?
- Maybe some people imitate - hints Vovochka - on the other hand
Chernobyl affected, and the fact that the father in Sekstagone works. But you
think, a teacher, about me, something that is not something I'm very into the trachea
strong.
Joke #17893 —  
 
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Inscriptions in the outhouse up Anadyr.
Roma-herders. Mihalich from Moscow.
"You're uleevod. Chukcha from Chelsea.

Nuzhdin-Large
Joke #17892 —  
 
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In Moscow, near the Ukrainian Embassy, held a gathering, someone
deceived addicts. They chanted: "Gas in fat do not change!".
Joke #17891 —  
 
0
 
Construction Firm Kuznetsk Story ...
Reklamnys slogan:
We put on CONSCIENCE
Joke #17890 —  
 
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All amused house Eblonskih.

Razebnik Bar-pour
Joke #17889 —  
 
0
 
OPERATIONAL DUTY
I order you to dramatically increase the political and moral state. Password for day
"Liters" tip morsels. Confirm your acceptance.
ZAMKOMPOMORDE

Deputy Commissioner of Maritime Affairs
Password and snacks adopted. POLIMORSOS specifically increased.
OPERDEZH
Joke #17888 —  
 
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