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I wonder what bastard put us in the dead man's mouth?
- How to work part time programmers at night?
- Cars with software unloaded.
Quarreled two lesbians. One offended and leaves, while the other cries and
- Wait, what did you throw me?
- At x% d, at x% d!
There comes a student (C) by the name of Pak to take the exam. Professor (P) its
(R) - What is your name?
(C) - Pak.
(P) - How, how?
(C) - Pak, Pak.
(P) - How is Pak?
(C) - As the Park.
Along the street were women and men ....
The U.S. Congress decided to begin impeachment proceedings in connection with the fact that George
Bush failed to win the top prize in the nomination "The Dumbest Man of the Year
World award for stupidity. It is assumed that the duties of the president
U.S. will be assigned to the winner of this contest journalist Anne
- Vano, why are you leaving aul?
- I want to find myself in the city.
- Wah, you got lost there?
The new mixer - 2000 rubles in credit card for Mastercard.
Repair in the bathroom - 20000 rubles krezhit on the map Mastercard.
Two bathrobes - 3000 rubles in credit card for Mastercard.
Writing this fool on the paws, so that valves are not so much twisted - priceless!
If no # ban-mother did not come to Mohammed, then Mohammed is ...
Russia: Do the "oligarchs" began to take steal and apply to thieves
Israel: The accusation of anti-Semitic sentiment in Russia power.
Aunt comes into the store and says:
- Give me "Mister Proper" with otebyvat ... Ugh! With bleach.
New reality show: "MP"
Accommo at SMIC.
Selling books: Men's Logic (20 pages) and women's logic (10 books of 400 pages)
Discovered the secret of the popularity of the song "Black boomer. As it turned out not enough
Who knows what a "boomer", but everyone is impressed by what he
"the girls really like!
For explanation of advertising:
In cell erudite snakes conducts campaign against illiteracy: ".. And the name of Victor in Latin
means the winner .. "From the top bunk question:" This is our Vitya-petushara --
winner?? "" Of course. And we love so much ... "
A new draft of seven-star hotels. In the numbering of floors
No number 13 and 15.
Well Snake garynychu, three heads!
Right votku can eat, beer left!
- A mean why?
... the average pukes!
explanations of jokes "Khodorkovsky was transferred to a chamber containing 12
All of them are charming polosanyh mannequins in bathing suits. "
In the cell, which contains 12 prisoners were transferred Khodorkovsky dressed
a striped swimsuit
The Polish Foreign Ministry is naive to believe that beating
You can only children.
By number of diplomats beaten in the competition Poland - Russia
4:2 in favor of the Poles.
Marx's Law: the number will inevitably turn into money.
Let our beat and more, but theirs is stronger.
One of nature gives money, power and strength, others - work in the budget
New premium service from mobile operators: "Subscriber caused
Your device is temporarily unavailable for unknown reasons "
If you suddenly became six to drive fast, accelerate briskly;
longer break and rattle, take a look - maybe it's six
After his release from prison Mrs. Julia said that Kuchma shit on her
dignity and wash away the shame can only be his blood.
Judging by recent photos of Ms. Tymoshenko, Kuchma's alive.
Perelitsovanny anecdote. Announcement: Chukchi requires the Governor
surname to HIV, sleep, matte or Berg. A with the name on to take? -Na
to Chukchi not. -Hey, Cogan, you will not take.
water tank crashed into a bus, utanulo 10 people, and the tank More
with alcohol crashed into a bus, swell over half of the city, and More with
other villages gathered
Today, George Bush paid a return visit srancho Vladimir Putin.
A woman selling cucumbers and persuade shoppers:
- You do not see that he is a great ... He is good inside!
Yesterday, the hospital was taken from the victim of bird flu. By
the physician he cackle, rushing eggs and require a ticket to the south.
He was detained while trying to crap a statue of Lenin. During the arrest he
had a fierce resistance and pecking at the two myeon ... ... e staff
In South Korea have cloned a dog is very tasty.
Want a great idea how to get rid of dandruff.
Send "Dandruff" in 4242.
Hello, on the radio program "Five Evenings" and I have her leading ...
Open a new site for atheists. Unfortunately, no one believes him.
Recently discovered in the archives of encryption, sheds new light on the heavy
everyday lives of our heroes. Here it is (published without cuts):
Alex-Eustace: "Man, know thyself" (himself) - Kozma Prutkov.
Eustace, Alex: - tired and weary, send radistki Kate.
They say that the path to fame lies in bed. This is not true.
Once the director has worked with a group of girls who wanted at any price
become stars. Released Statute:
- And you girlfriend, if not go to bed, still in the singer's no good.
After the second beating each placed a Polish diplomat in
Ten guards. After the third beating the Poles rebelled account 13:3
in favor of Russia ...
Wedding without vodka - the rope without soap.
For a Russian foreign currencies will always be curious
pictures, which can be collected only for the collection and exchange, and
ruble, even in Africa, the ruble, even if it they do not and leaf
Man - this is what he thinks about others. What he thinks about himself, it
his personal misunderstanding.
Esly liver does not like about yourself, then you are not Russian!
- All going home in the village, I will continue to cause papa!
- So, you drink?
For ticket before Putinsburg can come only in Stalingrad.
- Let so: fly separate from the cutlets.
You will eat the flies, and I - burgers.
All men are brothers. This is especially true in Belarus.
We and the Old Man is one at all.
Absolute freedom is when at all intersections in all directions burns
A guy comes home with a live goat in his arms and found his wife sitting
- Look, dear, that it is the same one cow, which I do
love, when you have a headache.
My wife looks at him disdainfully and says:
- Lord, you are so stupid that you can not distinguish a goat from a cow!
- Lord, you are so dumb that you can not understand what I am talking to
Internet cafe. Evening. All the toil of idleness on the Internet.
Suddenly, Okuda something from the corner cry:
- Do you know what the diameter of a member of the whale?
All at once revived, began to learn.
- 50 cm!
Here in a girl's spontaneous gesture (like a fisherman), showing
this diameter. And the phrase:
- 50 cm! So it's possible to suffocate!
A man standing in line at the cashier in the supermarket. When he sees that from
next turn him waving kick-ass blonde. High,
skater, in general, the poet's dream. The guy at the focus does not remember where he
acquainted with this beauty, and began frantically to remember.
The beauty of coming to him, and the guy tries inquired her hints
under what circumstances they met.
"Of course I could be wrong, but I think that you are the father
one of my children, "she says.
Guy ochumevaet and trying to figure out when is the last time he was
unfaithful to his wife. Finally suspicion flashed through his mind.
"You ... You are the very same guest stripper at my bachelor party,
I fucked on the table, at the time, as your girlfriend
I whipped the lash, and then shoved me in the ass with a bottle? "
"No, I'm just a teacher of mathematics of your son ..."
The guy with the girl sitting in a restaurant.
Legenky ordered a salad. Sit eating. Girl from time to time
glancing at the menu. Finally a guy says:
- Well, can we order hot?
- Yes, yes - happily nods to the girl.
- Waiter! Two teas please!
Democracy in Russia naberaet turnovers Zaporozhets. slowly and tactfully.