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LizoBLYadstvo
and BLYaDOlizstvo
(but who in any case or sucks otlizuet --
this question is very complex:)
Joke #19703 —  
 
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- A young man, how are you so sold their liver, kidneys, bone
brain, two liters of blood, 55% of the skin and the right eye on
transplantation. And how do you now own a living will?
- And Th? Ten bucks, they are not redundant.
Joke #19702 —  
 
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In one of the schools have invented a time machine and sent Sasha A-level,
Serega majeure and Vovochka-addict respectively, in 150000 BC,
1545 AD and 1937.
After a while they come back and tell.
Sasha-A student: - I got so in the primitive school, where children are stupid:
Nichrome not know and can not do anything. So I decided to sketch and
advised to dig a pit for the mammoth. But this time there passed drunk
leader with their elders, well, they all lay down in the hole. Short
I got pi @ # s for the full program. Barely feet claimed.
Serega majeure: - Well, I got to church school. All of these sit
boring. And I tell them about our lives, showing mobilku and include
recorder. They both zaorut: - He ventriloquize! Short accused me of
Satanism and gave such zvezdyuley that I do not know how and got back.
Vova-addict: - And I was cool, but .. little boring!
All: - What is a sudden?
Vova-addict: - Yes, I can not when smoked, and began "Treason!" scream, well
so the whole class and shot!
Joke #19701 —  
 
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A man wakes up after a heavy drinking binge, looks under the blanket, and he was there
someone wanker. Views peasant looks ... Suddenly his face lit up:
- Remember that pen-on-a-omnyat!
Joke #19700 —  
 
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For men vodka always ends unexpectedly. A woman and only this
waiting.
Joke #19699 —  
 
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The girl turned out to be a clockwork! I found where to insert key!
Joke #19698 —  
 
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- And why his eyes are square?
- And because through him put on a round sum!
www.xaxaxa.ru
Joke #19697 —  
 
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He wanted a lot of money, but it is - pure love, which was recorded in
marriage contract.
Joke #19696 —  
 
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In Russia, sobriety - is the norm of drinking, and the search for the rule - the rule
life.
Joke #19695 —  
 
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Send package from the film "Fuji" and win fudzhihuy.
Joke #19694 —  
 
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After much wrangling finally evacuated settler family
from the Gaza Strip.
- Sarah, do not cry, I understand that you feel sorry for our home, but do not cry!
- Oh, Moishe, I'm not crying because ..., but because you're not a Jew!
- Sarah !............. Sho is!?
- While you're rested, spitting, kicking, our neighbor Fima evacuated
twice and has already received two awards!
Joke #19692 —  
 
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2008. Passing credentials successor, the GDP has remained true to himself. With
new president's inauguration, he went away on the lawn mower. This
mode of transport it is not used during his presidency
period.
Joke #19691 —  
 
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- Son, well, when did you become an adult? .. All in toys to play:
some boats, the boats, the planes, rackets ... Before neighbors
awkward, they say: "The country needs the head.
Joke #19690 —  
 
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- Interestingly, while those who ate two packs of ice cream, which bought the GDP in
Zhukovsky for 500 rub?
- They were sent to the homes of Sakhalin.
Joke #19689 —  
 
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Finally! In the light went out a provocative new movie about the Timoshenko
Saakashvili!
In response, the Ministry of Culture of Georgia and Kiev studio them. Dovzhenko
announced a new hard shooting porn film in the center of the plot
which - homosexual love of a young boy from Moscow on behalf of
Vova and well-fed boy from Donetsk on behalf of Victor!
Joke #19688 —  
 
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- Khrenova perhaps? when you have a black house cat live?
- You bet! Every day the way I pass the parasite
Joke #19687 —  
 
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There are two prostitutes, one says: These are the things once blowjob
Yushchenko, the other to interrupt, but Tymoshenko is good to lie, then, everyone knows u
scaly no dick ....
Joke #19686 —  
 
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Tymoshenko was worth only hear about the Gaza Strip, as Israel immediately
chose to give it to the Arabs.
Joke #19685 —  
 
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U.S. State Department for the recognition of $ 200 million spent on
Georgian army was not in vain - created 2 battalions of Georgian
spetsnaz for stealing cigarettes from Russian military.
Joke #19684 —  
 
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SPRING APPEAL

The best spring appeal are invitingly spread out legs
women.

Alex, a volunteer
Joke #19683 —  
 
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Stirlitz rode a bicycle and broke eggs on the frame. 2 days Abram
died
Joke #19682 —  
 
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-Papa! A management Oka law needed?
- Not only the right but the duty to maintain all counter
cops and their family members, my son!
Joke #19681 —  
 
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Orange implontant?

Ukraine "Yes!"

Israel "Taki!"

And the color of the same :-)
Joke #19680 —  
 
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The first in the history of the Nobel Prize in mathematics was a mathematician B.
from Russia for the calculation of the chances of team Russia at the beginning of World Cup
after a draw with Latvian team.
Joke #19679 —  
 
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Pencil with eraser - says it all ... second part removes everything that we
have done ...
Joke #19677 —  
 
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in the Baltics, even live broadcast is delayed by 15 minutes
Joke #19676 —  
 
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- Do you have Internet access, or not?
- We have internet ru!
Joke #19675 —  
 
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Fearing Russian television fans in a match Latvia-Russia,
Letts broadcast the match delayed for 15 minutes.
Joke #19674 —  
 
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In New York on Wall Street, there are three homeless beggars. Served poorly. One
found a piece of cardboard and wrote on it: "a bum". By evening he tossed 3
U.S. 5 cents. The second took a piece of cardboard and wrote: "bomzh.com." By the evening at
He had a laptop and a channel to 256K. A third wrote: "e-homeless." Company
Microsoft immediately entered into a contract with him for a million dollars
drafting e-commerce, e-homeless-Millenium ". By the evening of it
said all of New York. Oracle announced 100% support of technology
e-homeless. VISA and Europay announced a promotion with the company
"e-homeless" cooperative brands. Last night was quickly established company
"HighTech-e-homeless", "CyberBroker-e-homeless", "OnLineTrader-e-homeless" and
"Mobil-e-homeless-Telecom". In the morning the stock exchanges around the world occurred
collapse of all non-"e-homeless" companies ....
Joke #19673 —  
 
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Judgment. God sits on a huge light at the foot of the throne which
crowd of people, angels and devils. Someone left it to send commands,
that is, hell, someone on the right - in paradise. There before the throne of God
turns out to be a lawyer.
- Oh - Loudly God. - You have something like hell. Go on, wicked!
God is ready to specify the left hand, but the lawyer corrects butterfly and
puzzled, asks:
- And what is actually happening?
Upon him from all sides start pshikat angels, like, it's terrible
Court, and you talked enough here too.
- Ah well! Since this court, even "terrible", then I demand the disqualification of a judge!
- Challenge declined! - Sternly said God.
...
After several hours of debate. And finally God says wearily:
- Well, well. So it and be - for the active repentance, I will appoint you
posthumous stay in hell CONDITIONALLY - and pointed with his hand on the right.

Whack Pvtzueff
Joke #19672 —  
 
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- A young man, how are you so, first, all things from the apartment
rendered, and then the very flat Gypsies for pennies lowered, and now
on the street you live?
- And Th? Ten bucks is not superfluous.
Joke #19671 —  
 
0
 
A new chewing gum Orbit Professional ...
Soon be acquired Orbit Home Edition and the Orbit Server

not mine
Joke #19670 —  
 
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Judging by its characteristics, the company (the) Sky (b) Link and
Meg (APD) ofon - a brainchild of the company Necrosoft - the same freaks ...
As a parent ... even worse ...

GuyNaNy
Joke #19669 —  
 
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Five peas were put princess - she died ...
Joke #19668 —  
 
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She played a favorite game, and was already on the 179,845 level, which flew
Windows.
For years, life went under the dog's tail.
It is revenge!
See the new season! Uma Thurman in the movie "Kill Bill-3"
Joke #19667 —  
 
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Two pathologists:
- Why do people smoke?
- To work with us was!
Joke #19666 —  
 
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Experimental Aircraft Design Bureau invites you to work
beta-testers.
Joke #19665 —  
 
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They play "monopoly".

- (Get money) Ukraine me!
- You with gas or without?
Joke #19664 —  
 
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- Doctor, immediately pull out the thermometer!
- Sorry, but still less than five minutes?
- Doctor, but this is the tenth thermometer!
- Oh, sorry, sorry!
- And I do something for tea come to you.
Joke #19662 —  
 
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Two cleaners:
- Hi stick.
- Hello Khokhlushka.
- And why do people smoke?
- And so we work it was!

www.xaxaxa.ru
Joke #19661 —  
 
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Mobile-MIA wholesale supply of phones.
Joke #19660 —  
 
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"Bon appetit" at McDonald's .. About! This subtle mockery.
Joke #19658 —  
 
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what rating?
- It figures change their places depending of type of who and how
paid
Joke #19657 —  
 
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Karachentsev Goes to his mother and then call that teschya died. Ur-ah. Op-la.
Boom!
Joke #19656 —  
 
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Fascinating shooter-strategy "Russia!"
Weight opportunities! You can fly on this SU-2!
Pozapuskat cruise missiles from a submarine!
And of course, earn a good bonus! "
Joke #19655 —  
 
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If flies are flying around you, then you may well perform a song
Winnie the Pooh: I cloud, cloud, cloud, and not shit ...

Dmitry Zhdanuhin
Joke #19654 —  
 
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"How can we now close the budget deficit?" - Thought President,
hundredth time studying the tax return of Yulia Tymoshenko ...

http://censor.net.ua/
Joke #19653 —  
 
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When throwing a pie in the face with a client, ask for an advance payment!
Joke #19652 —  
 
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Presidential Decree:
Due to changes in Russo-Polish,
Russo-Ukrainian and Russo-Israeli relations urgently
rename the names of the stations of the Moscow subway "Warsaw",
"Kiev" and "Street. Academica Yangelya" in "Babiyyarskaya-1", "Babiyyarskaya-2" and
"Babiyyarskaya-3".
Joke #19650 —  
 
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2050. Russia - the world's only superpower. As in time
Yeltsin introduced a fashion for Tennessee, so long ago in 2005. life
President Vladimir Putin introduced the fashion of TU-160. Since any self-respecting
oligarch has a personal strategic bomber Tu-160 to
to sledat sunbathing in Miami or lose two or three million
dollars in Las Vegas.
Poorer families pool their savings to rent a TU-160 to the weekend
flying over Estonia.
Mad popularnostyu among high school students enjoyed a hike Weekend
Nad Warsaw at low level.
As part of the humanitarian program "Children of Iraq" organized walk "Two
in one "- for one child may consider flying at low level, and London, and
New York.
Joke #19649 —  
 
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